The Cold
by thelittlerat
Summary: Gail/Holly - Spoilers for Season 5. My version of Gail and Holly finding their way back to each other and the bumps in the road along the way.
1. Chapter 1

Holly sloshed her way through the wet, gray snow barely picking up her heavy boots slowly making her way up the sidewalk to her house. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and bury herself deep under the covers. Maybe then she could forget the feeling of another day spend without Gail in her life. Every part of her body ached from stress and exhaustion. Every part of her body yearned to get back what it momentarily had with the one person she felt completely connected.

Months of friendship; weeks of being lovers; one night of misunderstanding and hurtful jabs; and here she was: three-weeks, seventeen text messages, four quick voicemails and one very long, sloppy-drunk voicemail later and still no closer to the best friend and lover she had come to cherish with all her being. She was tired, emotionally beat-up and for the first time in her career she had made a mistake that day at work that could have put the wrong man in jail. Luckily it was caught before the analysis could be finalized, but that didn't stop her from getting called into her boss's office for two-hours of 'root-cause analysis' and destroy whatever fabric of strength she had been clinging to. It had been a horrible day and she knew the night wasn't going to get any better. She had found herself in a darkness she had never been in before and needed to find some way out before it enveloped her entirely.

She clumsily reached into her messenger bag blindly grabbing her keys when a shadow of movement caught the corner of her eye. Startled, Holly jumped back slightly, dropping her newly found keys to the ground. Instead of reaching down for them, she scanned the area around her in search of the shadow. It only took a second before she was staring into the blue eyes that haunted her dreams each night.

Holly watched as Gail stood on the porch with her hands buried deep in her pockets with an air of intense stoicism. Her eyes bore into Holly in such a way that left the brunette feeling vulnerable and emotionally naked. It reminded her of the first time they had met in the woods. That posture of a highly-trained guard mixed with the inquisitive gaze of someone trying to figure out the world around them. It was one of the first things that had attracted Holly to Gail and, in the pale of the moonlight only a few feet away from each other, the attraction only grew deeper.

Holly was so lost in the moment and what it could all mean it didn't register to her that Gail had finally moved from her position until she heard the jingle of her keys bobbing up and down in front of her face.

"You're gonna to need these, Lunchbox."

Holly squinted her eyes in confusion and tilted her head slightly to the left. "Gail? Wha…what are you doing here?"

Gail shifted a bit side-to-side placing her hands back in her pockets taking the keys with her. With a little bravado and a slight shrug she said, "You called me."

"Gail, I called you multiple times in the last few weeks. Nothing! You just went silent. Now you're standing here like I just called you on the way home from work so we could grab a pizza. What the hell?"

Holly wasn't trying to start a fight, but she was confused, exhausted and had a sudden overwhelming need to protect herself from being hurt any more by this woman that unknowingly held so much power in easily devastating her life. A part of her was screaming to lash out. To take all the stress, the worry, the failed attempts at reconciliation and throw it all back at Gail so she could feel the pain she was feeling.

Just as Holly was about to unleash her frustrations, she looked back at Gail and noticed a very visible shift in the blonde's demeanor. The momentary bravado that had moved her off of the porch; the quick draw of arrogance mixed with nonchalance that expelled her opening line were all washed away. In its stead was a quaking vulnerability and uncertainty that nearly shattered Holly's heart. Holly knew, in that instant, that there was no pain that she felt that wasn't already coursing through Gail's veins with the same force.

The two women stood in silence for a few moments, not really knowing where to go from there. Finally Gail found her voice again. This time though it was quiet and shaking.

"I'm cold. I'm sorry. I'm cold."

Holly nodded her head and reached forward tugging Gail's leather jacket at the elbow as she began to walk them silently to the door. She reached into her messenger bag for her keys and fumbled around for a second when she once again heard the jingle in front of her. She shook her head at her stupidity and grabbed the keys from Gail before letting them both into the warmth of her house.

Before Holly could comment about getting them out of the cold and into warm sweaters, Gail spoke once again in the same quiet tone as she stared intently at her boots.

"I'm cold."

"Gail, I know. How long have you been outside?"

Gail creased her brow at the question, but didn't really answer. Instead she continued her own train of thought. "They say I'm cold. I have no feelings and I'm a terrible person. I'm not girlfriend material. They're my friends, some my former boyfriends even, and this is how they see me. This is who I am to them. Who I am… I thought…I thought I was different with you. I thought I was better, but then the first sign of anything going wrong and I walked away. I didn't know how to stop it. You called and you tried and I stayed silent because I'm cold. I'm cold and unfeeling and I don't know how to be anything else."

Holly's breath caught in her throat. This woman standing before her…this woman who, at first appearance, seemed so confident and secure was crumbling in an avalanche of insecurity. Holly had seen a few cracks in Gail's amour in the past. Cutting her hair off in a drunken panic attack was clearly the biggest, but even then Gail recovered fairly quickly. This was different. This was more. For the first time, Holly had a real sense of how deep Gail's insecurities lied.

Holly took a small step forward and bent down slightly to try and catch Gail's line of sight. "I wish… Gail, I wish for just one moment you could see yourself the way I see you. Your bravery. Your wit. The loyalties that bind you – even to those that have made you doubt yourself."

Gail stepped away and walked through the kitchen. She stopped when she reached the staircase and pivoted back in Holly's direction. "Holly, don't make me out into something I'm not. I know the things I've said to people. I know how I've treated them. How I've treated you. I didn't even give us a second chance."

"Why are you here? Gail, tell me. I need to know."

"I don't know."

Holly put her hands up in frustration. "That's not enough. Not this time. I've spent too many nights sick to my stomach over this. I would do anything to change that night. For you to see how much more our relationship has meant to me than what you heard. I want this. I want us, but I need to know why you're here. Gail, please answer me."

Gail looked back down at her boots - the conflict clearly playing across her face. Holly wanted nothing more than to reach out to her but she needed Gail to give in. She needed her to give into herself for once and break free of the emotions that weighed her down and kept her at arms-length.

"I'm cold." Even as the words came out of Gail's mouth, the tears running down her cheeks were telling a very different story.

"Dammit, Gail! I can't do this. I can't. I've had a horrible day and I just need…I just want… Please, just answer my one question. I know I hurt you, I'm really sorry, but you came here. You're here and... Why? Please just tell me why. It's not to tell me you're cold and we don't get a second chance. It can't be. Please, just let me in."

"I bought you a pashmina the other day. It was this deep blue that I thought would look amazing with your skin. When I got the box in the mail and opened it this sadness came over me that I had never felt before - this sense of loss. I picked up the phone to call you, but I couldn't get my fingers to hit the buttons. I couldn't make myself do the very thing I wanted most of all. I wore that scarf the rest of the day."

"Gail..."

"Holly, a woman almost died in my arms a week ago. She did die at the hospital. Her last words were spoken to me. I had asked her name and she told me her daughter's instead. 'Sophie. Sophie, please.' That's what she said. Her dying words were of the one person she loved most. She knew she was leaving and she didn't have a choice in the decision. No matter how much she fought, she knew she was going to lose. It was out of her hands."

This time Holly didn't stop herself from reaching for Gail. She gently ran her thumb under the blonde's right eye brushing away the tears. She was a bit surprised when Gail took her hand into her own and rubbed her cheek against the warmth of Holly's palm.

"Honey..."

"Holly. I don't know how to do this. I want to be better. I don't want to be cold and terrible, I really don't, but I don't know how to turn off all voices in my head telling me I'm not good enough. I bought you a pashmina, but I couldn't give it to you. I tried to return your calls, but my fingers wouldn't move. So tonight I walked from the precinct to your house knowing I would be too tired and cold to try and walk back and too anxious to get into a taxi. I got to your porch. I don't know how to get any further, but I got to your porch."

Both women stood silently in tears. Holly looked down at her hand still holding Gail's. The difference in their skin tone reminding her of how beautiful the light and dark could play off each other. How perfectly they could fit together if given the chance.

She took a deep breath and once again leaned in closer filling Gail's ever-guarded space. "You got to the porch. I got us over the threshold and out of the cold, but the only way we get any further is to do it together. We were doing so well, but we were living in a dream. Things are going to get hard sometimes, people are going to say things, but we fight for us. Gail, we do have a choice and we can win. I am in this, but this time… Gail, this time there is no walking away in silence."

Holly took another deep breath and kissed Gail's hand that was still so tightly holding onto her own. "Gail, tell me why you're here?"

Holly sighed deeply as Gail finally, intentionally, locked eyes with her. She watched as a confidence, a true confidence, crossed over the blonde until it reached into her eyes and deepened the blue to a shade she had never seen before. For the first time in weeks she allowed her lips to begin forming the slightest hint of that lopsided grin that somehow overtook her in Gail's presence when she heard Gail respond.

"I'm here to fight for us. I'm here to give us a second chance. Holly, I'm in this too."

_A/N: Many have played this scene out in their own wonderful unique ways. This is my take. I am sure the show will do it greater justice than me and I know a few writers around here certainly will, but I thank you for reading anyway. I have a few more ideas on how to continue this so I will keep it as 'in progress' for now_.


	2. Chapter 2

Gail walked into the lunchroom in search of her target. She was on a mission and it surprisingly did not involve food. It didn't even involve Holly; which was even more surprising considering the conversation they had had the last night. After Gail finally admitted she was 'all in' they were both too exhausted to really take the conversation further and agreed it would be a work in progress. The look of sadness and exhaustion that had ghosted both their faces for weeks had finally begun to visibly clear by morning. By lunch, Gail had a little more bounce to her step and she felt, for the first time in a while, that her life was slowly moving forward in the right direction.

Gail looked around at the few stragglers milling about until she found the man she was looking for. Without a hello or warning, she dumped a pile of papers on top of the lunch Nick was eating.

"Twenty-four hours! That's all it took for you, Nicholas, to be the hottest stud to ever grace badgebunnies dot-com. Here's your bounty."

Gail plopped down into the chair next to him, leaned back throwing her feet up onto a nearby chair and stole one of the carrots Nick had on his makeshift placemat.

"Gail! You didn't!"

Gail gave him a mischievous grin before turning more serious. "Oh, I did. I told you I was going to. Why are you so surprised?"

Nick picked up the papers and couldn't help but scan through them as he tried to be stern. He was having a hard time keeping a straight face though. This was the side of Gail he had always loved the most – the flip, socially rogue and awkward, fun side of her that he knew very people got to see.

He started looking at the profiles of women and then asked, "Is there really a site called badgebunnies dot-com?"

"I have no idea but I wouldn't google it at work if I were you. Don't worry your… and I quote from Staci1982… 'sex-on-a-stick wrapped in a hot uniform'… self about it. I used a very reputable site. Had I known 'war-hero soldier boy who drives a motorcycle and keeps the streets of Toronto safe each night' was such a turn on, I would've charged admission. I have weapons and shoes on-hold in need of funding."

"I'm sure there aren't that many… whoa! Is she for real?" Nick held the picture up a little closer examining it with a smile on his face just as Gail plucked it out of his grasp.

She gave her ex-boyfriend an exasperated look, "Really? That one was a test, Nick , and you just failed."

"Did you look at her?"

"Oh I see the huge rack and neon white teeth, but look at that bio. She doesn't even type in full sentences! OMG and BTW are not proper uses of the English language. She's a moron. Don't you ever want to hold a conversation with this woman?"

Under his breath, Nick couldn't help but mutter, "Silence in a relationship may be a welcome change."

Gail ripped the profile in half with fake outrage, "Whatev. LOL. This is serious, Nick. It's time for you get back up on that horse." She shuffled the papers around until one caught her attention. "Here, this one's a school teacher. They love men in uniform. Think of all the little educated, public servants you two could pop out."

Nick took the paper but didn't really look at it. "Why are you doing this? When did this become our relationship?"

Gail grabbed another carrot and tossed it up and down. Her voice softened with her reply, "I don't know. We hurt each other. A lot. But…you're not a terrible guy and I am trying to not be a terrible person, so I'm gonna help you." She then switched her voice to a low drawl. "This sad, kicked puppy look needs to stop, Nick. It's not going to bring 'all the ladies to the yard.'"

Nick couldn't help but laugh. "You know, this isn't even in the top ten of the weirdest conversations we've had. Fine. I'll take a look at these, but I'm not making any promises."

Gail crunched the carrot with satisfaction. "That's all I ask. Well, that and for you to use this numbering system I've created so I know how to respond." Gail passed over another sheet of paper.

Nick looked over the list. "Gail. Number three is questioning why their parents chose to procreate. You can't say that to someone."

"It's a very legitimate question and based on a few of these profiles, I feel like it's one that should be asked more often. You don't need to pick it, but I felt it should still be an option. You'll understand why when you read some of these."

Nick tilted his head a bit as if he was trying to decide what to say next. Finally he caved. "Soooo, ah, any of these women interesting to you?"

Gail gave him a mild glare. "Huh? Still not entering the top ten weirdest?"

"Strangely not."

"They're based on your type, not mine. Besides, I'm not single."

A brief silence fell between them before Gail continued. "Oh, don't give me that look. I haven't gone completely insane and created some imaginary relationship. Holly and I…well, we're talking again. Working things out."

Nick looked genuinely please. "Yeah?"

Gail smiled at him. She had really missed talking to Nick in these last few months. They may never have been destined to end up a couple, but they actually made pretty decent friends. "Yeah. We're going to take things slow, you know. It's new so don't…"

"I won't. You and I were never very good at slow."

Gail laughed and shot back. "You and I were never very good at a lot of things." She noticed the sad puppy look started to creep up Nick's face again and softened. "Some things though. Some things we were really good at. We could always make each other laugh."

Nick threw the rest of his lunch in his bag to be tossed and started to shuffle through the profiles again. "Does Holly make you laugh? Does she make you happy?"

Gail didn't verbally answer. She didn't need to. The quiet and genuine smile that crossed her lips at the mere mention of Holly and the subtle nod of her head was more than enough of a response.

Nick paused on another one of the profiles and held it up. "Whoa. I didn't know pictures like that were allowed on these sites."

Gail leaned in closer so she was shoulder-to-shoulder with Nick. "Well, I mean, she is clothed – mostly."

"I can't believe you included this one. What exactly do you think my type is, anyway?"

"You mean aside from independent women in uniform from legacy law enforcement families? I don't know. Everyone needs a flirty-dirty-Friday-dial-up, Nick. She could totally fit that bill."

"I'm pretty sure that outfit has probably earned her quite a few bills. Do you think the picture is upside down? How is she standing that way?"

Nick and Gail both tilted their heads to the side as Nick began to slowly turn the picture at different angles. They both heard a voice speaking from behind them.

"It's optical illusion photography. She's actually positioned on her side. If she tried to stand that way, her Vastus lateralis muscle would probably strain too much and she would fall over."

Gail reached for the paper and turned it sideways and nodded her head in understanding as Nick looked up at Holly contemplating the photo like it was evidence with her hand now placed softly on Gail's shoulder. He looked back at the photo and then once again at Holly then Gail.

"Now this is starting to make the top ten list…. Yeah, huh…I'm gonna…my lunch is over, so, uh…yeah." Nick jumped out of the chair and went to step aside before remembering his manners and offered his seat to Holly. She smiled knowingly at him amused by his sudden flustered nature and took the seat. Nick went to walk out the door, but pivoted back again and grabbed the pile of papers.

"I'm on desk today. Sometimes it can be a little boring."

Gail grinned happily at him and then called out in his direction as he walked out the door. "I want numbers on every page, Collins! You have until end of shift!"

Holly just shook her head and laughed as she handed Gail over her half of the sandwich she brought.

Gail smiled back at her appreciatively.

"Hey, Lunchbox."

"Hey, yourself."

Gail was on late-lunch that day so they now had the room to themselves. They sat in silence for a few minutes eating their shared sandwich enjoying the other's company before Gail inquired, "Is that weird for you? Me talking to Nick?"

Holly took a sip of her juice before answering. It wasn't really to give her time to think about her feelings on the subject, but more about how to respond. After their conversation last night, Holly began to realize just how much Gail listened and took in every phrase spoken and nuances of the people around her. It didn't make her nervous about saying the wrong thing as much as wanting to make sure she really heard her when she was trying to say the right thing. She reached out and subtly placed her fingertips on the side of Gail's leg playing with the seam of her pants.

"No. Nick's been part of your life for a long time. It's a good thing you don't want to cut him out. It shows how much you care. I trust you, Gail. I trust you completely."

Gail glanced over and gave the brunette a shy smile before dragging her fingers over Holly's briefly pulling them into her grasp before letting go.

"Are you still friends with any of your exes?"

Holly quipped, "I bury them all in a nice little spot out in the woods. I still talk to them but they don't really talk back. Just the way I like it."

Gail narrowed her eyes and wrinkled her nose. "You're so weird. Come on, I'm serious."

Holly wickedly grinned back, "How do you know I'm not?" She laughed quickly at her joke before continuing, "Markus and I are friends. He was the last guy I…well, you know. He works at a law firm a few blocks from here and we meet for drinks every now and then." Holly noticed the way Gail shifted in her seat. She couldn't help but be amused at how the blonde was turning a little green by the conversation she had started. She threw her girlfriend a bone, "Sometimes he brings his wife too. I was actually a bridesmaid at their wedding."

Gail shook her head and laughed affectionately as she visibly relaxed. "Of course you were. What about girlfriends? Were you and Lisa or Rachel ever…"

Holly put her hand back on Gail's leg - this time not quite as subtle and a lot more comforting. "No. Rachel's straight – single but definitely straight."

"As opposed to the kinda-sorta straight that makes serious exceptions to that particular rule?"

"Right, as opposed to that."

"And the other one?"

"Also known as Lisa… no, we never dated. Looking back, I think she may have been interested at first, but I never really was. At the time I was still a bit confused and gun-shy about a lot of things. Look, I know she comes off a certain way; and, Gail, I swear I am not defending her or what she said, but she really helped me come to terms with myself. She was there when I didn't really have a lot of people to turn to. She can be really hard to deal with, but she's been family since then. Rachel was her friend first. That's how we all ending up together."

Gail nodded taking in the new information. She was trying to figure out how she felt about the conversation they were having. In actuality, it probably wasn't the best thing to discuss at the station during lunch, but it was also something they both knew needed to be discussed. This was part of them working things out.

Gail smiled, "I'm glad…I'm glad you found someone to help you."

"When she steps off her high-horse, she's actually fun to be around. I know she can be…well…a…"

"Bitch."

"Ah, there's the word I was looking for." Both woman laughed and shared a knowing look.

"You know even if there was ever an attraction on my part, and there wasn't, Lisa is a total power-dater. Only the best and most successful attorneys and investment bankers ever get notches on her bed post."

Gail turned her nose at the slightest thought of Lisa in a bed. It took her a second, but it then absorbed into her brain the underlying comment Holly just made. She then remembered the way Rachel and Lisa had teased her at the bar and she once again curled her fingers around Holly's which were still firmly placed on her thigh.

"You're better than all of them. Holly, you are so out of their league. You're amazing at what you do and you care so much. Hell, if you were on TV there'd be blogs about you. There should be anyway."

Holly smiled but didn't say anything, so Gail continued. "Why did you choose forensic pathology? Lisa said you were at the top of your class. I'm sure you could've been any kind of doctor you wanted."

Holly shrugged, "Yeah, I could've, but…I don't know. I don't have some tragic story about a family member's murder going unsolved and this is my way of honoring them, if that's what you're asking. If I were in TV, I'm sure that would totally be my story, but it's not."

"No, just curious. I've never asked you before. I guess I've just always just thought what you do is incredible and never imagined someone would see it any other way."

Holly squeezed Gail's hand in thanks. "Forensics pathology was a required class in school. I hadn't really given it much thought before then, but I picked up the information really fast and I spent hours delving into the case studies. I just fell in love with the science of it all.

A few months into my actual job, I had this case of a woman in her twenties that died in her sleep without any kind of warning. Her family was so shocked and distraught. I know I couldn't really help them grieve, but I figured out why she died. I was able to give them that little piece of information. After that, I started to see more than the science. It hurts more…some of the cases. Once you open yourself up to it you can never really go back; but I know now that I never want to do anything else – be anything else but a pathologist. It's who I am."

Gail looked down at the table it brushed a few crumbs side-to-side. "I think I get that."

"I know you do. I see it in you every time you put on that uniform. I see the way you try and absorb all the hurt from those that can't protect themselves. You see them when no one else does. I see you, Gail, the real you."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah, you wanna know why?"

Gail tilted her head to take in Holly's gentle features and half-grin as she nodded her head in affirmation.

"Because, you and I… We're in the same league. No better. No worse. It's ours and we are in it together."

_A/N: Thank you all for the reviews and follows. I love and appreciate each and every one more than you know. Typos and grammatical errors are all me. I'm sorry. I know people have some pretty strong feelings (dislike) towards Nick. I wasn't super happy about how they played out that relationship, but there is something about having a character that has known Gail for such a long time and seems to want to always bring out her quirky fun side that I do enjoy._


	3. Chapter 3

Gail and Holly sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, finishing their lunch, and occasionally passing side-glances and smiles back-and-forth when Gail noticed a figure breezing through the break room darting straight for the refrigerator.

Oliver grabbed the bottle filled with Celery's latest concoction – purple this time. He began shaking it furiously before pausing, straightening his back and pivoting to take in the two people sitting at the table. He caught Gail's eye passing her a look that could only be described as that of a proud father. His small grin grew bigger as he walked toward the couple.

"Well, well, it seems one of my fine officers here has found herself a kid on the playground to steal lunch from."

Holly turned to face Oliver and shot him a happy smile. "She tripped me near the swings and ran away with my lunchbox, Sergeant. At least she let me have a few crumbs so I wouldn't wither away."

Oliver threw his best exaggerated disapproving-look in Gail's direction and pointed his figure at her. "Officer Peck, is that any way to treat the courier? We like this one so be nice."

Gail couldn't hide her grin at the exchange. She stood in mock attention. "Yes, sir. From now on she'll only get the best, sir."

Oliver tilted his head in approval. "Very good, Officer." He then held up his smoothie. "Would either of you ladies care for a sampling of today's brew?"

Gail just grimaced in response, but Holly leaned forward trying to figure out the make-up of the drink. "How did it get to be such a bright color? I don't know of any fruit or vegetable that would create that."

Oliver shook the bottle once more. "You know, Doctor, that is a very good question and one I am too petrified to ask. All I know is I can now remember more than five things off of a list, I ran three miles the other day without being winded and I can…I can…well maybe you don't need to know the other things I seem to be better at these days."

Gail's laughter could be heard from the hallway as Holly once again examined the contents. She looked up at Oliver and commented, "You know, if you ever want me to run that through the chromatography machine…."

"Thank you, darlin', but some things are better left a mystery. Who knows why they work, but they do and spending too much time studying them doesn't change that."

Gail grabbed the garbage off the table and crumpled the papers into a ball. "Alright, Yoda, I'm afraid lunch break is over. My boss is kinda a jerk about these things so…."

"Yeah, yeah… You better get back out on those streets before I pull out the demerit book."

Holly watched the friendly exchange observing how relaxed Gail was around Oliver. There were so few people she had witnessed Gail not be on guard with – it was lovely to watch.

"Sergeant, I hope you don't mind me crashing the break room."

Oliver patted Holly's shoulder, "You are welcome here anytime." He then directed his attention over in Gail's direction as he added, "After all, you help us with some of our most challenging cases. Have a most wonderful day, Dr. Stewart." Oliver then circled back toward the cupboards leaving the pair to say their good-byes.

Holly turned to Gail and subtly hooked her little finger with the blonde's for just a second before letting go. "Hey, I have a case that is probably going to keep me at work most of the night. There was a fire in Jamestown and they suspect arson."

Gail tried her best to hide her disappointment. She really wanted to see Holly that evening and continue working on their relationship. She tried to play it off as best she could. "The one with the bones in the basement?"

Holly shook her head in confirmation. "Yeah. I should be free by tomorrow evening. You could come over? Get take-out maybe?"

Gail paused for a moment and spotted Oliver from the corner of her eye trying to pretend he was still looking for something in the cupboards when he was clearly eavesdropping. She took a deep breath knowing Oliver wasn't going to leave anytime soon and she was going to have to just dive in.

"Holly, would you go…I mean…would you like…" She brushed her hand over her face and took another deep breath.

Holly tilted her head to the side in confusion. "Gail, are you okay? 'Cause I'm trying not to worry here that this is what someone looks like before they spontaneously combust."

Gail dug her heel into the floor and reminded herself that she was 'a Peck' and 'Peck's' were not blithering idiots. She could do this. It's not like they hadn't done stuff together before. Stuff that could technically be classified as dates, even if none of them were formally announced that way. Evenings ending at three in the morning in a pile of sweaty, satisfied limbs were most certainly dates.

Gail straightened her back and tried again. "Holly, would you go out with me tomorrow evening? You know, on a date?"

Gail visibly relaxed when her courage to ask the question was rewarded with one of the brightest smiles she had ever received. She had absolutely no control over the smile she returned.

"You want to go on a date? Like dressing up, overpriced food and real table linens kind of thing?"

Gail tilted her head down slightly in shyness nodding yes before finding her snark and teasing, "I'd hate for you to never get the chance to break out your formal flannel."

"Well I did just get my backpack bedazzled…" The two women spent the next few seconds grinning at each other like fools before Holly continued, "Gail, I'd love to go on a date with you – anytime, anywhere."

Gail hooked her pinkie finger with Holly's mirroring the quick note of intimacy from earlier. "I'll pick you up at your place at seven?"

Holly nodded her head, glanced back to acknowledge Oliver still milling about (and now humming to himself the theme song from the _Dating Game_) before blowing Gail a kiss and walking out of the room.

Gail turned her attention to her boss, "_Oliver!_"

Oliver held his hands up. "What? I'm just taking ten minutes out of my day to drink my smoothie. Isn't it time you go find Epstein and get back to work instead of using the break room as your very own…"

"I beg you not to finish that sentence, sir."

Oliver walked back over to Gail and placed his hand on Gail's arm softening his features and once again becoming the paternal teddy bear Gail loved so much. "I'm proud of you, kiddo. You did good."

"I don't usually ask…"

"I know and Holly knows that too, so it means even more."

Gail bit her lip. "I'm trying."

"One foot in front of the other and then one day you'll find yourself running without even realizing it. "

Gail scrunched up her nose. "I hate running."

Oliver chuckled, "Yeah, but you don't hate that girl. Now get outta here. I want my streets kept safe so people can go on dates and run marathons. Got it?"

"Yes, sir!"

_The Next Day_

Gail tapped her fingers on the steering wheel going back and forth as to what to wear tonight for her date with Holly. She had called for reservations at Shoto the second they'd opened and snagged her parent's season tickets to whatever show was playing at the Royal Alexandra. She had actually convinced Steve to get the tickets so she wouldn't need to go into detail with her mother as to why she had wanted them. It had only cost her three weeks of picking up Steve's dry cleaning, bringing him coffee and detailing his car. Overall, and considering the things he'd previously suckered her into for favors, she considered it a raging success.

She felt the phone in her pocket vibrate and reached in to grab it while she waited for Chris to come back from getting his forth coffee of the day. A message from Holly crossed the screen telling her how much she was looking forward to the date and asking for the third time where they were going and what to wear. She smiled to herself as she typed her response of '_food, culture and as little as possible without me having to arrest you_.'

Before she could respond to Holly's witty and not-even-close-to-subtle response, Chris jumped back in the car and started chattering.

"Who are you so giddy about texting?"

Gail shot him a glare. "I am not giddy. I don't do giddy, Diaz."

"Uh huh. You're giddy. Did you find a horse to…?"

"Chris! Don't. We aren't discussing horses and bucking and whatever else is going through that wound-up little brain of yours."

Chris started beat-boxing to the music apparently playing in his head and took another gulp of his coffee.

Gail pulled away from the curb and headed west towards the park. They always did a sweep of the park in the early afternoon. "Chris, I know I'm not one that should give advice on people's diets but don't think maybe it's time to cut back on the caffeine? The hamster is now officially in overdrive and the wheel is going to fall over."

Chris became uncharacteristically defensive and shot back, "You're right, Gail. You shouldn't give advice. You eat like shit and then think a cleanse is going to just fix everything. I'm fine. I know what I'm doing."

Gail caught Chris from the corner of her eye as he turned to face the window and took another drink. Chris seemed off to her – more than usual – and she began thinking back through the last few weeks for additional signs of this change in personality. Before she could focus too much attention on it, dispatch came through the radio requesting assistance with a dispute on Richmond. Gail paused; waiting for Chris to acknowledge, then shook her head in frustration when it became obvious he wasn't paying attention.

"Hey, hamster, you planning on working today?"

"What?"

Gail huffed and grabbed her radio. "Dispatch this is 15-04 responding. We're two minutes out." She then added to her partner, "Get in the game, Diaz."

Gail pulled the cruiser up to the corner perpendicular to Richmond Street. It wasn't going to be difficult to identify where the commotion was – two men were blocking the sidewalk in each other's faces screaming and pushing each other back-and-forth.

The two officers jumped out of the car and quickly headed toward the men. Chris got to them first and placed himself partially in-between the two men as Gail commanded them to calm down and separate.

"Hey, both of you separate now!" One of the guys lurched forward again and Gail pulled out her baton and steeled her glare at him. "I said separate. Do you want photos of you crying like a little girl going viral when a woman half your size has you on the ground in ten seconds? I'm sure this crowd of rubbernecks would love nothing more."

The man eyed up Gail then glanced over at Chris, who had his hand firmly placed on the other guy's chest holding him back, before relaxing his shoulders a little showing he was backing down.

The other guy used the moment to jump into the mix. "He started it. That piece of scum stole my watch and my woman."

Gail turned to the guy speaking. "You seem more upset about the watch."

"It was a really nice watch! Give it back now, Pauly, or I'm filing charges."

Pauly took a few steps forward placing himself about a foot from Chris and spoke over the officer's shoulder. "Tell you what…I'll give you the watch and Angie back at the same time – when both no longer wind up."

The comment was all it took for the two men to jump right back into a physical fight; only this time Chris was right in the middle. The first thing Gail noticed was that instead of trying to defuse the situation, her partner had pushed Pauly forward becoming as much the aggressor as the other two. Everything was happening quickly and Gail knew she couldn't detain three men by herself so she had no choice but to radio for back-up. She then grabbed the arm of the smaller guy and used her knee to block his forward momentum and get him pushed back a few feet.

He surprisingly pulled back with her and she managed to get him cuffed to a nearby bike rail as she turned back to see Chris and Pauly still fighting. She took a few steps forward when she found herself being momentarily blinded by an elbow coming in direct contact with her face. The force of the blow knocked her to her knees. Before she could react, the full weight of a man falling on top of her released all the air out of her lungs with one swoop and the sound of her body hitting the concrete filled her ears. Everything after became a complete blur.


	4. Chapter 4

Gail quickly caught her bearings and began pushing and shoving her way out from underneath the man on top of her. She saw a flash of red flannel and realized it was Pauly – a man at least 280 lbs – who was also trying to fumble his way back onto his feet. Unfortunately that meant he was using Gail as leverage to get there.

As she began yelling at him to get off her, she felt his entire weight quickly being removed. She had never been more grateful to hear Nick and Dov's voices filling the space around her, directing people to get back and settling down the situation. With the light of day back on her face, Gail took a deep breath and began assessing her body for injuries. She tilted her head back and forth, her neck not overly enjoying the experience, and instinctually placed a hand over the left side of her face. Even with her hands gloved, she could already feel the skin under begin to swell and her left eye was not quite opening all the way. She ran her tongue over her teeth and sighed in relief that all seemed to be intact and she wasn't bleeding. She was definitely going to have a black eye, and she felt like it had been hit by a sack of bricks - which meant a number of bumps and bruises that seemed to so easily mark her pale skin, but otherwise she appeared to be fine.

Gail started to stand and found Nick at her side helping her up. She gratefully accepted the gesture. Nick then crouched down in front of her to get a better look at her face. She couldn't help but hiss when he gently touched her left cheek.

"You're going to have one hell of a shiner. I'm calling a bus."

Gail grabbed Nick's wrist and jerked it off of her. "Don't you dare; I'm fine." She then took a few seconds to look around at the rest of the scene. The guy she had handcuffed to the bike rail was now in Andy's squad. Pauly was cuffed trying to frantically explain his side of the story to Dov and Chris was standing a few feet away catching his breath with a worried Chloe by his side. She then felt her stomach bottom out when she realized how this situation was going to play itself out when they got back to the station.

"Gail, they're going to want to check you out. Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"Nick, I said I'm fine, ok; nothing a bag of frozen peas can't fix."

Nick leaned in a little closer and quietly asked, "What happened? How did this get so out of control?"

Gail briefly glanced in Chris' direction before turning back to Nick. She put her hand back over her hurt eye and shook her head a little indicating she didn't want to discuss it. Nick gently squeezed the top of Gail's arm for a second and nodded his head in understanding. Before either could say anything else, an ambulance rolling up to the scene caught both their attention.

Gail huffed in frustration. She looked around again to double check that no one else was injured before saying, "Who called it?"

Dov finished putting Pauly in the back of the squad before walking over to Gail. "I did. You need checked out. Nick can take big man over there to the station. Andy's got the other guy and is going to take Chris. I'm staying with you and Chloe and the others will take witness statements."

Gail shot Dov an annoyed look. "Who put you in charge, little boy?"

Dov placed his hands on his belt and stood taller. "Someone needs to step up and fix this mess." He then waved the paramedic over and gave Nick a look to get going. Nick turned to Gail once more to make sure she was alright before following Dov's orders.

"Ow! I hope you aren't thinking med school is in your future, buddy!" Gail sat on the stretcher slightly swinging her legs off the side while the medic ran through his check-up. Dov sat on the ledge near her in the bus with his notebook out taking notes.

"Epstein, don't I get some kind of privacy for medical check-ups? Are you sketching my profile over there?"

Dov's agitation was becoming more and more evident. "Can you take this seriously, please? I'm trying to do my job here. You know the one you should have been doing."

Gail turned to the medic. "Could you please pass me the nearest sharp object and then turn the other way for a second?"

The medic didn't hesitate to look concerned by the situation he had found himself in but, to his credit, just nodded his head 'no' and continued trying to do his job.

"You have no idea what you are talking about, Epstein, so I suggest you shut it."

Before Dov could respond, the medic cleared his throat and started to speak. "Uh…Officer…none of your injuries appear to be significant enough for us to take you to the ER. You're definitely going to be sore for the next few days and your black eye will be impressive. We can take you to the hospital for x-rays just to make sure there isn't greater damage to the eye, or you can follow-up with your own doctor today or tomorrow."

Gail started to push off the stretcher. "Thanks. I'm good. Dov, let's get out of here."

Gail signed whatever papers the paramedic put in front of her and let him help off the bus. She walked over to her squad car, pulled out the keys, and climbed into the passenger –side without another word. Gail caught her reflection in the side view mirror and took in the black and blue marks already clouding the left-side if her face. For the first time since all this chaos began, she allowed her thoughts to drift to Holly and their date. She shut her eyes tightly, not caring how much pain it was causing, and tried to stop herself from crying. Everything had flipped on its head. Her whole day was ruined and she was going to let down the one person she wanted more than anything to impress. A wave of nausea brought on by physical pain and emotional distress threatened to overtake her.

She heard the car door slam next to her, but didn't move. Dov said something to her, but she didn't hear it and didn't care enough to ask him to repeat. He started the car and they began their drive back to the station. Gail forced her thoughts away from Holly and, after a few minutes, turned to Dov.

"It's not just caffeine."

Gail noticed Dov's grip tighten on the steering wheel, but he didn't say anything so she repeated, "It's not just caffeine, Dov. Chris…He's…"

"Don't. Gail, don't say it."

"We need to help him, Dov. You didn't see him today. You don't…"

"I said he's fine, Peck. You don't know him like I do."

"Really, Dov? You've slept with him? Shared his bed and held him when you thought he may die?"

"He's going through a rough patch, but he has it under control."

"Was that 'under control' today? Someone could have been seriously injured."

"Is that what's this about? You getting a black eye?"

It was taking everything Gail had to not lose it on her friend and start screaming. She knew Dov was just being defensive, but he was being an ass about it. She took a moment before responding and tried to see the situation from Dov's perspective. Chris was his best friend and he was heading down the same path Dov's brother had. His shots at Gail were about protecting Chris, not hurting her. Regardless, the accusations stung and she was going to have a very difficult time being the bigger person in this conversation.

"You tell me, Epstein, right now. Tell me that you wouldn't be even a little concerned if Chloe was partnered with Chris tomorrow. You tell me that and we end this conversation right now."

Dov paused and twisted his grip on the wheel knowing he couldn't say it. He then asked, "Are you going to report him?"

Gail's body stiffened in surprise. "What?"

"He'll get fired, Gail. This is all he has. What are you going to tell them when we get to the station?"

"He's my family too and he needs help. WE need to help him. He is not going to get fired if the department understands…"

Dov relaxed a little, but clearly wasn't ready to back down. "Understands what, Gail? That he came to work high and his partner got hurt because of it? You think they'll just let that go away? He's not a 'Peck.' It doesn't work that way for the rest of us."

Now Gail let her anger flair. "You think being a 'Peck' saved me when I was demoted?"

"You weren't fired!"

"Only because being out of uniform when facing the guy that shackled me to a metal table in his basement wasn't good for the prosecution, Epstein!"

Both remained silent for the next few minutes. Gail covered the left-side of her face with her hand to stop the throbbing and also so Dov couldn't see the tears falling down her cheeks.

Dov spoke up once again, only this time calmer. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. He's my best friend and I don't know how to help him. I shouldn't take it out on you."

"No, you shouldn't. I would never sell out Chris, or any of you."

"I know. I know that, Gail. I should have seen it earlier. I've gone through this before…I should have known. When we got to the scene and he was fighting that guy... He was literally fighting him. Not trying to subdue him or arrest him, just fighting. It's not the first time it's happened."

"What? Dammit. Dov, why..."

"I know. I'm sorry. I just didn't want to see it." Dov pulled the car into the port at the station and turned the engine off. He rubbed his hands over his face in frustration and worry.

Gail bit her lip and turned to Dov, grimacing at the pain that shot through her from the action. "There were witnesses. It doesn't matter what I say."

"I know."

"He'll be brought in front of the review board, but if we can get him to get help they'll give him a second chance."

Gail's heart broke a little as she watched he friend try not to cry. He quietly asked, "What if they don't?"

"Then we formally file the paperwork to adopt him, he stays on the couch, we keep him stocked with that disgusting cottage cheese he loves so much and we make sure he gets clean. I'm going to want child support payments though."

Dov allowed a sliver of a smile to cross his lips and grabbed Gail's hand. "I'm really sorry. It's not your fault. I can't believe I let it get this far."

Gail squeezed Dov's hand in response. "It's not your fault either. He's not your brother, Dov. It's not too late."

Dov just nodded his head before getting out of the car and coming around to open Gail's door to help her out. She stood for a moment taking in just how much her body was beginning to ache, and then turned back to Dov.

"I don't want to go in there."

Before Dov could respond, Andy walked up to the pair with a concerned look.

"Hey, Gail, are you alright?"

Gail just nodded her head, not really wanting to chat anymore.

"Oliver wants you to go straight to his office."

Gail tightened her lips and nodded again as she started to walk towards the office. She heard Andy call out from behind her that Jarvis was in there too. _'Just great. Like this day couldn't get any worse.'_ she thought.

When Gail got to Oliver's office she caught his attention through the glass and he nodded his head for her to enter. Inspector Jarvis was standing off to the side looking more than a little angry.

Oliver stood and ushered her in. "Office Peck, please have a seat. Are you alright? You didn't need to go to the emergency room?"

Gail glanced back-and-forth between Oliver and Jarvis picking up on the tension between the two. Her defenses immediately shot up in protection of Oliver as she tried to figure out how this was all going to play out. She decided to take it one step at a time and do her best to keep calm.

"No, sir. The paramedic cleared me with instructions to follow-up with my own doctor."

Jarvis moved forward and leaned against the desk. "You'll want to do that, Peck. It should all be noted in the report."

Gail tilted her head toward the inspector. "Which report would that be, sir? The one against the two guys fighting in the street or my and Office Diaz's personnel files?"

Gail noticed the slight curve of Jarvis' lips at her inquiry. She had known John Jarvis since she was young. He was a friend of her father's. She wouldn't say she particularly felt close to the man; he was just another one of the department higher-ups she was forced to come downstairs and say hello to when it was her parents' turn to host poker night, but he never seemed like a bad guy. He used to laugh at the sarcastic things she would say to her dad in fun and she could tell by his demeanor he was recalling it now and wasn't looking to do her in. She wasn't worried about herself in this situation though – she was worried about Chris and how this was going to reflect on Oliver's leadership.

Jarvis replied, "Office Peck, why don't you explain what happened earlier this afternoon."

Gail did as she was told and walked them through step-by-step the details of the incident, leaving out the part when Chris became the aggressor and instead simply stating a fight ensued. She ended it by saying she felt an elbow hit her and then Pauly fell on top of her. Everything after would need to be answered by another officer at the scene.

"Officer, whose elbow hit you?"

Gail looked at Jarvis in confusion. She thought back to that moment trying to recollect. Suddenly she had a flash of blue fabric in front of her face, but wasn't 100% sure of what she was thinking and didn't really want it to be a reality. Instead she just said, "I don't know, sir."

Oliver entered into the conversation with his fatherly tone. "Gail, multiple witness statements indicate that Officer Diaz was the one to hit you."

Gail looked down at the floor. This was so bad for Chris. She needed to find a way to help her friend. "As I told you, the two men began fighting. Chris tried to break it up. We were trying to stop the fight. If he accidentally hit me in the process, then that's what happened. The guy he was trying to hold back was huge."

"Was he holding him back or aggravating the situation more?"

Gail sat up straighter in her seat trying to stay calm. "Inspector, Officer Diaz was trying to get control of the situation."

Jarvis nodded knowing he wasn't going to get anything else from Gail. Police didn't rat each other out and no one was more loyal to the code than the Peck's. Still, he had a few more questions for the officer.

"Have you noticed anything different in Officer Diaz's personality recently?"

Gail nonchalantly shook her head 'no.'

"You haven't noticed that he has been late for parade four times in the last two weeks?"

This time the blonde gave a tight-lipped smile and responded "Not my turn to baby-sit him, sir."

Jarvis narrowed his eyes a bit showing her sarcasm was no longer welcome. "Are you implying that Sergeant Shaw should have been more vigilant in his management of Office Diaz?"

Gail sharply turned her attention to Oliver trying to convey her apology before turning back to Jarvis. "No, sir! That was not what I was implying, sir."

"Office Diaz is one of your roommates, is that correct?"

"Yes, sir."

"And you haven't noticed any changes in his behavior? Excessive alcohol consumption? Drug use?"

Gail knew she was being tested. Inspector Jarvis wouldn't have been asking the questions if they hadn't already figured out that Chris was taking drugs. She didn't know how they knew, but they did and Chris was probably currently being tested to prove it. Jarvis asking her was a formality, but it was also his way of finding out what kind of cop Gail was.

"Sir, I have not been paying much attention to my roommates in these last few months. We all have our own lives. However, if Officer Diaz is in trouble then my hope would be that this department does everything it can to help him get back on his feet. I, personally, will do everything I can as well. He's a good man, a good officer and has had a very difficult year. I would hope that is taken into consideration, sir."

The inspector nodded his head. "Very well, Officer. Shaw, could you please give Peck and me a moment?"

Oliver stood to leave placing his hand briefly on Gail's shoulder on his way out letting her know she had rest of shift off and to go home and rest.

Jarvis rounded the desk taking Oliver's chair and faced Gail once more. "You're loyal, Gail. Being a Peck runs deep."

"Being a police officer runs deeper, sir."

"Of course." Jarvis leaned back in the chair and studied the blonde for a moment. "So, what is it you want to do next, Officer? Detective? ETF? Straight to Administration?"

Gail looked at the inspector wearily. She really didn't feel like having this conversation, especially since she was fairly certain Jarvis was just asking on behalf of her mother. What was she supposed to do though? She sighed in resignation and gave her stock answer. "I am still weighing my options, sir."

"Have you heard of Operation Phoenix?"

Gail racked her brain for a moment trying to recall anything. She was sore and tired and wanted nothing more than to get out of that office. Nothing seemed to come to her. "No, sir"

"Good, then it hasn't hit the rumor mill yet. We have a task force starting in a few weeks. I can't go into the details, but we are going to bring in one female and two male officers to work undercover assignments. It's a minimum ten months fully immersed. You're one of the two females we've narrowed it down to. The other is in the 23rd and since I've been more involved in the 15th recently, I would like to see you get the job. It would look good for everyone involved."

Gail sat silent trying to process the information. Ten months undercover was a long time. It only took six months to ruin her relationship with Nick. What would ten months do to her and Holly? They had barely gotten back together. How could she leave? She was a half-second away from turning down the opportunity flat before the voices in her head started reminding her that she was sitting in the office with a rumpled uniform, a black eye, and a number of bruises she hadn't even started to inventory. Holly deserved more. She deserved so much more than ruined dates and emotional basket cases that were never going to be anything more than 'just a cop.'

Jarvis took in the way Gail sat weighing this new information. He decided to continue. "This opportunity would be very good for your career, Gail. You could write your ticket after. I know it's a difficult thing to leave your friends behind, but this is the time to do it. You're not married nor have children. Not to get personal, but I don't believe you are in a relationship either. A couple years from now, it will be more difficult. Take it from me, I know. This is high profile – we are going after one of the largest and most connected cartels in the city. You can be a part of that."

Gail knew the comment regarding relationships was Jarvis channeling her mother, but she let it pass. Bringing up Elaine in this conversation wasn't going to do anyone any good, specifically her. What it did tell her was that, regardless of how much people in the 15th seemed to know her business, it still hadn't reached her mom. The more duplicitous part of her brain questioned that maybe her mother did know and this was a way to get her away from Holly, but she knew her mother well enough to know that that wasn't the way she worked. Gail would have had a few dozen phone calls before Elaine resorted to such treachery.

If anyone was going to tell her mother about Holly, it was going to be her. She hadn't exactly been secretive about them dating, but she planned on doing the respectable thing and tell her parents herself when the time was right. Now she was being faced with the prospect of leaving all of it behind in favor of her career. Gail just couldn't get the smile Holly gave her when she asked her on the date out of her mind. It kept pushing her into more and more confusion. She swallowed and finally spoke up.

"You said a decision hasn't been made yet?"

"No. Like I said, I am pushing for you to get it, but the final decisions are being made by the Chief. It's that high profile."

The Chief, as in her godfather…. Yeah, she had a pretty good idea what he would decide if she had voiced any interest in the job. She was sure Jarvis knew that too and was looking for her to make a move.

"Thank you, Inspector, for your consideration and endorsement."

Jarvis crossed his arms and continued to study the blonde. "I sense a 'but', Officer."

Gail stood hoping Jarvis would take the hint that she wanted released from the conversation. "Sir, it's been a long day and it's a lot to consider."

Jarvis stood as well and motioned that Gail could leave. He reached for the door, but paused beforehand to add, "Officer Peck, opportunities like this don't come around very often. If you're backing out, I suggest you let it be known very soon. If you're offered the position and decline, it would not look very good for you or your career."

"Yes, sir. Thank you for the advice, sir."

Gail walked out of Oliver's office and headed for the locker-room. Before she could get there she spotted Chloe, Dov, Andy and Nick perched around one of the desks. Doc called her over. She thought about ignoring him, but remembered why they were likely standing there in the first place and headed for the group.

"Hey, how'd it go?" Dov tugged slightly on her shirt near her elbow letting her know he wasn't asking in an aggressive way.

Gail took in the deeply concerned looks on her friends faces and knew hers probably matched. "They knew. They knew before I walked in. Where's Chris?"

Andy spoke up. "When we got back, they immediately pulled him into a room. He hasn't been back out, but we saw Oliver go in, so that's good. Right? Oliver will help him."

Gail just nodded. "Yeah. I'm sure he will. I'm going home. Call me if Chris needs anything. Please?" The group just nodded quietly.

Gail sat down on the bench in front of her locker and closed her eyes. It was 4:30 but it felt like midnight. Holly would be getting off work soon to head home to get ready for their date. She fished her phone out of her pocket and stared at the image of Holly pulling a funny face that the brunette assigned to her contact name when Gail wasn't looking. Before Gail could gain any level of control over herself, she broke down in tears. Her tears fell for Chris, for the confusion of this undercover assignment, but mostly because she felt that, once again, she had screwed things up with the one person she was trying so hard to keep in her life.


	5. Chapter 5

For as much as Gail tried to stop crying and get control of herself she just couldn't. Too much had happened in the last few weeks. Too much emotion had left her raw. She leaned forward on the bench, folding her arms around her knees creating a little cocoon to hide her face. She could feel the pull on her left shoulder and side – remnants of having a grown man fall on top of her finally making it fully known. There was an ache deep in her bones from it that she almost welcomed – a physical manifestation of the confusion, worry and sadness whirling around in her head and heart.

She closed her eyes and tried to find something to center her mind and calm her soul. There were so many decisions to make. She was at a precipice - each decision that presented itself was going to catapult her life in one ever-altering direction or another. Should she go undercover? If not, what would she do with her career? Should she go home or go to Holly? Could she face Holly beat up and once again broken expecting her to pick up the pieces and make her whole again? Was that fair to do and would it ever change?

None of it seemed fair. Chris was facing termination and who knows what else for trying to find an outlet for his anger and sadness. Dov was blaming himself for not catching his best friend before he fell. Holly was about to leave work excited about going on a date not knowing Gail was going to throw a wrench in all their plans. Every time they thought they were finding some sense of normal, something happened to alter it.

Gail sat there for what felt like ages but was likely no more than a few minutes when she felt a soothing hand rub her shoulder. There were very few people that felt comfortable enough to approach Gail when she was in a state. The number was even less that would get close enough to touch her. She knew it was Traci before ever looking up.

Traci straddled the seat next to Gail and faced her friend. Gail quietly turned toward her and Traci took the array of colors beginning to outline the blonde's face. She shivered at the memory of another moment in time when they sat looking at each other in a similar fashion. If Gail didn't look so utterly lost in the moment she would have joked about her friend looking like a hot mess to add levity to both their thoughts. Instead she rubbed her hand along her back and gave her a small comforting smile.

"What do you need, Gail?"

Gail rested the side of her head against her bent knees and somewhat shrugged. "Answers…time…alcohol…online shopping spree? I don't know."

"How about a date?"

Gail huffed, "Trace, I know we've gotten closer over the years, but I just don't like you in that way. Wow, you have a thing for the Peck's don't you?"

Traci rolled her eyes and lightly pushed her friend's shoulder. "Not me, you idiot. A little birdie told me you were planning quite the special night for you and a certain doctor."

"I've been known to shoot little birdies right off their perch."

"Gail…"

"My brother would fit right in with the old ladies at the beauty shop. I'm really starting to wonder if he ever actually works. His gossip time allocation is so damn high."

Traci leaned back to give Gail a little more space. She had come to learn that when Gail was evading it was best to give her physical space as well. Not too much or she would run, but enough so that she didn't feel confined.

"Come on. I'll take you home and help you get ready."

Gail huffed. "I can't go on a date!"

"Of course you can. You asked Holly; you planned it all; now get your ass moving! I only have so much time and that eye isn't just going to magically cover itself! What color is your concealer anyway? We may need to pick up more… 'Shades of Ghost'…'Hint of Polar Bear'?"

Gail jumped to her feet, immediately regretting the quickness of the movement, but continued anyway. "Traci, I'm serious! I screwed up! Again! Holly is not going to want to be seen in public with someone who looks like they just went a few rounds with Ali. She deserves better than that. I'm just a cop!"

Traci stood as well, "Hey, I'm a cop too, you know, and I'm damn proud of it! We work hard every day to be where we are and we help protect this city. There is no shame in that."

Gail shook her head. "No, you're a detective. You have ambition and drive and people respect you. I'm the family screw-up destined to be nothing more than what I am right now. I didn't even know my own roommate was doing drugs, Traci. I'm sure they're going to beating down the door to make me detective after not figuring that one out."

"Is that what you want? To be a detective?"

Gail just shrugged her shoulders. The undercover assignment crossed her mind, but she knew it wasn't something she could discuss with Traci or any of her other friends. "I don't know. No. Maybe. I should know. I should have direction, but mostly I feel like I'm floating around not sticking to anything. Holly's known forever she wanted to be a doctor. She has focus and determination. She's already had to defend being with me to her friends once. It's never going to change."

Traci took in her friend standing before her. For all the bravado and claims of being awesome, Traci knew Gail had deeply seeded insecurities. Steve and she talked about it once. He told her about how their mother would harp on Gail to always be better. How she pushed her believing she was helping and Gail would publically do as she was told, but privately became more and more withdrawn. Gail had made a lot of progress in coming out of her shell and letting down some of her toughest barriers over the last few years. She didn't want to see her friend regress.

"You're forgetting something, Gail."

Gail rolled her eyes. "Traci, if this is about to be some 'you're a Peck and Peck's are respected and blah, blah, blah' conversation you are talking to the wrong Peck. That works for Steve…"

"That's not what I was going to say. You think I care about the whole 'Peck Legacy' thing? I don't. What I was going to say was the person you are right now. The person who seems so ready to disregard all that they are is exactly the person Holly wants to be with. Has she ever asked you to be anything else than a police officer?"

Gail looked down at her shoes and shook her head no.

"With all the worry that comes with being with a cop…all the sleepless nights, has she once asked you to change that?"

This time Gail verbally responded 'no' but still didn't look up.

"Has she asked you about your career aspirations? When you're going to become a detective or get promoted?"

The blonde took a deep breathe, "No, ok, she never has. I know she worries. I know in these few months she has started to learn what it really means to be with a cop and she hasn't asked. But, Traci, she shouldn't have to worry. She shouldn't have to pick me up from the hospital or justify to her ridiculously educated and successful friends why she is dating me." Gail then pointed to her eye. "This. This is a glaring reminder that she and I come from very different worlds. We're just trying to get back on the right track and this is like a foghorn as to why we shouldn't."

Traci took a step closer. She knew she was invading Gail's space but she wanted to get her point across. "Gail Peck, you did not ask for some guy to fall on top of you. You did not help Chris get high this morning before work…"

"I should have known about Chris! We live…."

"No! You couldn't control that. None of us could. Chris is the only one that needs to take responsibility for that. Now listen to me, you stubborn, stubborn woman. Holly is going to be leaving the lab soon. Now I can take you over there right now to talk to her; I can take you over to her house; or I can take you home where you can either get ready for your date or wallow in misery like only a Peck can. You don't want to go to some fancy restaurant and be seen with a black eye, then don't. Tell Holly you're doing takeout and a movie. You are in control of all this. You need to decide."

Gail sat back on the bench. Her thoughts were so scattered, she needed a few seconds to find some focus. "I don't know. What should I do?"

Traci rubbed her hand along Gail's shoulder. "I can't answer that for you. What I can say is that for some unknown reason that woman looks at you like you are a very important part of her life and if you walk away from her today…honey, I don't think you'll get another chance. I don't think she'll risk her heart again."

Gail nodded and bit her lip. Traci replayed the words she just spoke and internally chastised herself. "Gail? Gail, could you look at me for a second?"

When Gail did as she was asked, Traci continued. "I'm sorry for what I just said." Her apology earned her a bewildered look. "We've spent years making little comments about you. Sometimes it was to combat the ice being thrown at us, but not always. Listen to me…Holly doesn't like you for 'unknown reasons.' She likes you because you are generous, funny, loyal and, underneath a few rather interesting defense mechanisms, one of the most warm-hearted people I have ever known. She sees that, Gail. You let her see it. Don't walk away from that."

Gail wiped away a falling tear and reached out to take hold of Traci's hand whispering her thanks.

"Take a few minutes to get changed and wipe away the mascara running down your cheeks. You don't need any more color added to that face of yours today. I'll wait outside. When you get out, I want directions as to where to go. Got it, Peck?"

"Yes, Detective."

"Good. Get a move on."

Gail waited until Traci left before getting up and walking over to the mirror. Traci was right, her mascara was a mess. She did her best to clean her face and then changed back into her street clothes. When she walked out of the locker room ten minutes later, Traci was standing there texting on her phone and waiting as promised.

"Where to, Gail?"

Gail stopped in the middle of the hallway and hesitated for a moment before responding, "The lab. Holly's still there. I don't want to tell her about this over the phone."

The 'inner gossip' in Traci screamed to get more detail on Gail's plans, but she sensed her friend needed some quiet to organize her thoughts during the short trip so she remained silent as she took Gail's bag and they walked out of the precinct.

_Fifteen minutes later_

Holly finished typing the last of her notes before saving and closing her computer for the day. She inhaled deeply and spun off the stool she was sitting on with a dramatic flair. By her calculation, if traffic wasn't horrible, she still had at least a good hour to get ready for her date. Her girlfriend ran on 'Gail Time' which could mean she was an hour early or two hours late depending on her mood and the day, so she definitely wanted to be ready soon to anticipate whatever may happen.

She still had no clue what Gail had planned, but she did learn from Steve that she had put effort in the planning. Why Steve felt the need to personally drop off some evidence today was beyond her, but Holly had to admit it was pretty sweet how he managed to drop three times in the space of five minutes how much his sister was looking forward to the evening. Holly was still trying to figure the dynamic between the siblings, but she could tell the pair seemed to watch each other's back. It warmed her heart to know Gail was taking this date and the mending of the relationship so serious.

She went to grab her computer and head to her office to get the rest of her stuff, when a knock at the doorway caught her attention. She looked up and saw Traci Nash standing at the entrance.

"Detective Nash, please tell me you are not here to change my evening plans with some priority evidence. Not tonight!" Holly couldn't quite decipher the mixed expression that crossed the detective's face.

"Oh, I brought evidence alright…"

Holly watched in confusion as Traci reached behind the doorway and grabbed what appeared to be an arm, dragging the adjoining person closer to be seen. It only took a few second for Holly to recognize it was Gail. Correction, it was the right half of Gail. For some reason her girlfriend was refusing to be dragged any further which earned her a stare from Traci that could only be described as 'The Mother'.

Finally Gail moved the rest of the way and stood before Holly quiet allowing the brunette to process exactly what she was seeing. Gail's left cheek had a slight cut surrounded by dark blue, black and yellow bruising that ran all the way up to her eye. The eye itself and her cheek were each swollen making her face appear uneven. By the way Gail was standing, Holly deduced those weren't her only injuries. She swallowed hard to quickly try and calm her nerves and stop her stomach from doing a triple back flip.

All she managed to get out was "Are you okay?" Gail just nodded so Holly continued, "What happened?"

This time Gail spoke up, "Would you believe me if I told you I went to the batting cages?"

Holly tilted her head to the side and gave her best 'Really, Gail?' expression. "Based on your track record with that particular sport I could see you ending up like this, but I can't imagine you would ever willingly go back there so try again."

Gail's eyes rolled up to the ceiling as if she were searching for answers. When they returned to Holly, her girlfriend was now standing only a few feet in front of her. Gail tilted her head in Traci's direction. "Traci hit me. She's secretly a horrible person. Help! Save me!"

Holly and Traci passed a look to each other both recognizing Gail needed to brat this one out for a few more seconds.

"Really, Gail? She beat you up and then offered you a ride here?"

"She's tricky that way."

"How about the real reason this time?" Holly reached up and lightly touched the hurt side of Gail's face. She couldn't help but begin to assess the damage. She didn't observe any underlying injuries to the bone or eye, but wanted to take a closer look. First, though, she wanted answers.

Holly was too close for Gail to evade again. Having her girlfriend touch her was like a truth serum.

"Chris hit me and then a guy fell on top of me."

Holly inhaled with frustration. "Gail, can you please tell me what really happened and stop picking on your friends."

Traci jumped in quietly. "Actually she's telling the truth."

Holly looked back-and-forth at both women in shock. "Chris Diaz? Your roommate and ex-boyfriend hit you? If you don't say it was accidental, so help me…"

Traci commented when she noticed Gail was having a hard time finding her words. "It's complicated, but Gail here will explain all. Ladies, I should get back to the station." Traci turned towards Holly. "Do you have her or should I take her with me? Her return policy expires once I leave the building."

Gail scowled at her friend. "What am I? A puppy?"

"Constantly needs fed, hyper if they don't get their nap in, thinks their growl is super…"

"Ok, I get it."

Holly smiled at the interaction and interjected, "Don't worry, I'll take her. No returns needed. Gail, let's go to my office and get my stuff. We can finish this at home."

Traci observed the way Holly reached for Gail's hand and her friend held it without hesitation and allowed herself to be led down the hallway. How Gail didn't as much as flinch when Holly said 'home' as if it were theirs. How, even under the stress of the circumstances, Gail had visibly relaxed the second Holly was in view. Her friend had found her other half and she prayed she did everything she possibly could to hold onto it.

When they reached Holly's office, Gail stopped and turned to Traci. "Please call me as soon as you find out about Chris? If he needs anything…"

Traci gave a small comforting smile. "Of course. Don't worry, we'll all help him. He's family."

Gail nodded in agreement. "Trace?"

"Yea?"

"Thank you. You're really good with puppies."

Traci let out a quick laugh. "Well they're pretty darn lovable when they aren't trying to bite your ankles."

The two shared another acknowledging smile before Traci parted and Gail joined Holly in her office.

_A/N: Thank you all for the reviews. Someday I want to site down and respond to every one, but my job tends to get in the way (hence the delay in this update). Reviews, follows and favorites are like little presents being sent to my inbox to brighten my day. I love them all dearly and continue to be amazed that anyone would ever want to read anything I write. My sincerest thanks._


	6. Chapter 6

Gail silently followed Holly into the doctor's house and toed off her shoes in the entryway waiting for Holly to take the lead. They had been relatively quiet on the drive over both sensing that they needed to be outside a moving vehicle when they picked up where they had left off at the lab. Gail was exhausted and in need of some pain relievers, but was doing her best to hold off on taking anything. She really wanted to be as aware as possible during their conversation. Alcohol she could hold like a champ, but drugs – even aspirin – tended to knock her for a loop. Her trip with Oxy a few months ago was probably her finest example of that fact.

Gail watched as Holly pulled out a stool from the hall closet and placed it in the kitchen near the counter. She then flipped on all the lights before turning to Gail and pointing to the seat.

"Take off your shirt and sit on the stool."

Gail had absolutely no control over the smirk that crossed her face. "Wow, you and I clearly have different ideas on how to start date night. Not that I'm complaining or anything; I just thought I would have to at least buy you dinner first. Then maybe if things progressed well, it could end up here. Well, not on a stool; that's new. But hey, I'll roll with it."

Her bantering earned her a very well-deserved roll from Holly. "Gail, I want to check your injuries. By the way you are babying that left shoulder; I assume it's not only your face that was hurt."

Gail dropped her chin and teased, "Sooo, you want to play doctor?"

Holly bit the inside of her cheek to try and stop her grin. "It's not playing when you are certified by the CPSO, Officer."

"Well, I was always taught to never let an amateur do a professional's job. Good thing you're here, Dr. Stewart."

Gail then sat on the stool without protest and started to pull off her sweater. She got about halfway before the pain halted her movement and left her twisted up in the fabric.

"Holly! Hols? A little help here."

Holly shot over to Gail's side and gently helped her out of the sweater. When it was off she looked down at Gail staring at her with bright blue expressive eyes. Her hair was now going in a hundred different directions and all her makeup had been washed away at some point that day. Holly thought she never looked more beautiful…or more vulnerable. She stumbled to catch her words and not just lean in and kiss her.

"Uh…sorry. I was getting another light."

Gail kept her eyes locked on Holly's for a few extra seconds before turning to acknowledge the lamp now sitting without its shade on the counter.

"I'm fine, Lunchbox. I was cleared by the paramedic at the scene. No need to turn your kitchen into a trauma unit."

"Well, you weren't cleared by me. From now on this is part of the deal. I'll do my best to accept that your job puts you in harm's way on a regular basis…"

"It's not a regular…"

Holly narrowed her eyes warning Gail to not interrupt. "It's regular enough. Like I was saying, I'll do my best to not totally freak out every time you have a new cut or bruise, but you have to promise me that you'll let me check you out to my level of satisfaction." Holly caught the way Gail's eyebrows lifted when she said 'check you out' and made sure to add, "Medically check you out with my board certified degree, Gail."

Gail took a moment to weigh the terms of the agreement. She could think of a lot worse things than to be poked and prodded by her girlfriend. Overall this was a pretty good deal in her favor, but she needed to not admit that or the next deal was going to spectacularly backfire against her. So instead of smiling and cracking another joke, she huffed and licked her lips like she was really contemplating the deal.

"Fine."

"And you don't get to complain."

"Uh…"

"Gail, agree!"

This one was a little tougher to commit. Gail loved complaining. It was one of her favorite hobbies. The look on Holly's face at the moment though reminded her of how much Holly was also giving up in this negotiation so Gail just nodded her head in affirmation.

"Verbally agree."

"Fine. I agree."

"And…"

"There's another 'and' too!"

"AND if I determine, using my sound medical judgment that took years of training to achieve and is not centered around 'cop pride to never appear injured', that you need additional assistance that may or may not come in the form of a hospital, x-rays, or god forbid time-off of work, you will agree to it without debate."

Gail just opened and closed her mouth like a baby bird waiting to be dropped their lunch. This is where the negotiation could go sideways. The only time she ever allowed injuries to prevent her from going back to work as quickly as possible was right after Jerry died and that had more to do with being petrified and feeling too guilty to go to his funeral. Once she finally did leave the hospital though, she showed up to work a week earlier than the doctors advised. Holly was asking her to give up control of something big. If she defaulted to Holly's opinion to take extra days off for an injury and the division heard about it, she would appear weak and whipped. Her girlfriend was right about 'cop pride' when it came to this sort of thing. To agree to this meant she was trusting Holly to make decisions on her behalf and she never allowed anyone to do that for her in the past.

Gail tapped her fingers on her thigh for a few seconds. She looked at Holly once more when it hit her that she already trusted this woman enough to make decisions for her. This was Holly - her Lunchbox. She wasn't giving up anything new.

"I promise. I trust you - whatever you want."

Holly had watched the myriad of emotions cross Gail's face. She knew her words were not said lightly or in jest. Gail was committing to her fully. It was as close to a declaration of love as either needed in that moment. This time Holly didn't stop herself from leaning down and kissing her girlfriend softly. She pulled back when she felt Gail's hand snaked around her waist to pull her in closer.

"No, no, no, Officer. Sit back and still while I get a good look at this eye."

"I was having more fun with the kissing."

"Well, if you're good, maybe I'll kiss your boo boos to make them better."

"In that case I have many, many injuries that need attending, Doctor."

"_Gail._"

"Is this why you work on dead people? The live ones didn't think kisses were enough of a treatment?"

"Are you complaining about my methods? Do we need to review the rules again?"

Gail grinned said, "Nope," popping the 'p' with her usual brand of snark. It was followed by a groan and grimace when Holly rotated her shoulder to determine if there was any restriction in movement. Gail tried to distract herself by talking and not thinking about the pull in her shoulder Holly was causing.

"I'm surprised you waited until we got here to start this. I thought I would end up on your autopsy table."

Holly continued her assessment as she spoke. "Don't think I didn't consider it, but between all the comments you would've made about being touched by things used for the dead and the forty minute diatribe on germs, I thought it was best to come here."

"Wise decision."

"It baffles me that you will eat food practically off the street if its appealing enough and yet refuse to touch other peoples' furniture, clothes and ninety percent of my sterilized lab claiming it's going to give you the bubonic plaque. "

"I'm a complicated woman like that, Holly." Gail then jerked back when Holly touched a particularly sensitive spot near her ribs. "Ouch! Gentle hands, Doctor! I'm alive remember!"

Holly didn't respond to the comment but did take a small step back as she was finished. "You're definitely going to be sore for the next few days and I would encourage you to request desk duty, but nothing appears to be fractured or damaged enough for you to take a trip to the ER. I'm going to find my best drugs for you though or you're going to sleep like shit."

"Not oxy-level, right?"

Gail didn't need to say more. Holly knew why she had asked. The night she had picked Gail up from the hospital still high off her oxy trip, she had stayed at her house. The terrorizing and graphic nightmares the blonde had that night that catapulted Holly into her guest bedroom to find a shivering, shaking Gail in the fetal position was not something either of them wanted to repeat. Even the thought of them now left Gail looking a little pale and lost.

Holly stroked her hand down Gail's arm comforting her. "No, honey; let's start with some extra strength Tylenol. Ok?"

Gail just quietly nodded her head and followed Holly upstairs to her bedroom after a stop in the bathroom to take the pills. Once there, the brunette helped her into a zip-up hoodie and pajama pants. As Holly changed, Gail noticed a beautiful and sexy blue dress hanging from the closet door. Her heart sunk.

"I'm so sorry about our date tonight. I really wanted it to be amazing."

Holly spotted the dress to and hung it back in the closet before turning to her girlfriend sitting cross-legged on the bed up against the pillows. She sat down in front of her mirroring the position.

"They'll be other nights. You're safe. That's all that matters."

"I ruined it."

Holly bit her lip and took Gail's hand. "Tell me what happened."

Gail took her time and explained the whole day from making reservations, noticing Chris was off-kilter, the call to Richmond Street, and the fight that followed including Chris' role in it. She even mentioned her conversation with Traci and how her friend had helped her not run this evening.

Holly sat quietly taking it all in. She made a mental note to send Traci a very good bottle of wine and thought about everything else that was said. She knew there was something else between her girlfriend and the Inspector, but Gail didn't seem quite ready to discuss it, so she concentrated on Chris for the moment.

"Chris needs help."

Gail closed her eyes and nodded. "I know. I hope he knows that."

As if on cue, Gail's phone started ringing. She heard it but couldn't move fast enough to get to it. Holly jumped off the bed and grabbed the phone out of the pants hanging off the chair and handed it to Gail.

Gail didn't even bother to see who it was; she just answered. Holly went to get up to give the blonde some privacy but was stopped by a hand taking her own. Gail linked her fingers together with Holly's and she asked a series of quick questions mixed with 'okays' and 'yeses' to whomever she was talking to. A few minutes later she hung up and tossed the phone on the nightstand.

"That was Dov. Chris voluntarily agreed to be admitted to rehab. Oliver is taking him there now. There's nothing we can do. He won't have to go in front of the review board until after he finishes the program. Until then he is on medical leave. That's good right?"

Holly didn't know the inside politics and policies of the police department, but Gail wasn't really looking for discussion on the matter. She just squeezed Gail's hand and agreed with her.

"Hey, why don't we order some food? You shouldn't have an empty stomach with that Tylenol. The Chinese place around the corner is at your door before you even hang up the phone."

Gail chuckled. "You know what I like. I'm at least paying though since I was supposed to be taking you out."

"Half the menu, no tomatoes and double fried. My stomach weeps for yours."

Gail smiled at the normalcy of the discussion as if they hadn't been apart for these last few weeks. They were picking up where they left off, but somehow in a better, more open way. "I'm not super hungry. A quarter of the menu should be fine."

The two women shared a grin before Holly disappeared to make the order and wait for the delivery. Mostly Holly just wanted to give Gail a few minutes to herself. When she returned twenty minutes later, Gail was still in the same position with her eyes closed and her head tilted back against the pillows. For a second, Holly thought she had fallen asleep but Gail's good eye opened when she heard the bag dropping on the bed.

"Are we eating in bed?"

Holly shrugged her shoulders as she placed a few containers on the nightstand near Gail. "It's comfortable and you look like you probably shouldn't move around too much this evening."

"Well there went my thoughts for dessert."

Holly rolled her eyes. "Don't get food on the duvet, Peck."

"You brought the food; I can't be held responsible. Your room is going to smell like Kung Pow chicken, you know."

"We can suffer through it."

Gail wasn't going to argue anymore. Her stomach was rolling in hunger so she grabbed the nearest container and dived in.

Both women ate in silence when Gail decided to continue telling Holly about her day – about the undercover assignment. It was something she couldn't share with anyone else, but had to share with her girlfriend. Not just because it impacted her life too, but also because she needed someone to talk to about it and Holly was her best friend before they started dating and continued to be. They shared things.

"Hol, I want to tell you something that has to stay between us, ok? I trust you. I know you won't say anything, but I just have to ask. It's kind of a police thing."

Holly put her chopsticks in the container and placed it on the nightstand. She turned to Gail taking in the seriousness of Gail's expression. "Of course, I won't tell a soul. I promise."

"I know you won't." Gail hesitated for a few moments. She didn't know how Holly was going to react to this. She didn't even know how she was reacting to it. That's why she needed to talk to her girlfriend. "There's…uh…there's an operation coming up at work. A task force is being formed that is going to be very important and eventually very high-profile. I'm being considered for one of the jobs."

Holly sensed a huge 'but' to this conversation and she already knew she wasn't going to like it. Whatever it was, Gail was struggling to get it out. She sat quietly and allowed the blonde to work out her words.

Gail brushed her hand across her face, momentarily forgetting about her black eye, and hissed from the pain. Holly went to grab her hand, but she brushed it away. She couldn't continue if Holly was touching her. It would be too hard. She took a deep breath and pushed forward.

"It's undercover and the minimum time is expected to be ten months, which probably means a year."

Holly felt all the air leave her lungs and time stop before restarting in fast forward. It almost made her nauseous. "When you say undercover…"

"Deep undercover – new identity, new location, no communication with anyone you know or it could jeopardize the whole operation. There could be no exceptions."

Both women sat facing forward staring into nothingness for what felt like hours absorbing what Gail just said. Finally Holly spoke up, but still wasn't ready to face her girlfriend.

"A year is a long time, Gail."

"I know."

"Do you want the job?"

"It would be really good for my career."

"Would it be dangerous?"

"I don't know. Probably...Yes."

Holly cupped her hands over her nose and mouth and took deep breathes trying not to hyperventilate.

"Holly, I can't lose you. Not again. We just started to get back."

"You won't. You won't, Gail."

"I can't ask you to wait for me for a year."

Holly turned to Gail and looked her in the eyes. She didn't know if Gail was ready to hear this, but with all the miss-communication they had had, it wasn't time to hold back. "Gail, I've waited for you my whole life. I lost you for a few weeks and I almost went insane. If sacrificing a year gives me a lifetime with you, I'll take it. I'll always wait for you."

Gail stroked her thumb under Holly's eye catching the tears falling. She let her own fall without regard and leaned forward placing a kiss on her girlfriend's lips. "I want the lifetime too, Hol. But I'm selfish; I also want the year."

Holly placed another kiss on Gail's lips before pulling back, still holding her close. "Honey, this isn't just about us. You have to do what's right for you too. Our relationship won't work if we hold each other back. You didn't really answer my question before. Do you want the job?"

Gail was little confused and tilted her head to the side when she realized why. "You know, I don't think anyone has ever asked me that before. In my family, when an opportunity arises you take it. Actually you make the opportunities."

"Well, I'm asking. Gail, what do YOU want? I'm not asking about the prestige or how much this could help your career. I don't care about that. I'm asking you if this is something you actually want to do."

Gail sat back and cast her head down really thinking about the question. She thought about being undercover in the past and why she accepted the jobs. She thought about the work she had done with guns and gangs and the drug squad – both of which she imagined would be involved in this. She tried not to think about family legacy and being good enough for Holly or her family, just what she wanted. She knew her answer to the question. In a way, she had always known the answer but was too afraid to ever admit it.

"No. I really don't."

Holly ran her finger down Gail's arm to acknowledge how difficult it was for her to admit that. She pushed a little more. "Why? Why don't you want it?"

Gail released a deep breath she didn't even know she was holding. "I hate being undercover. I hate pretending to be someone else. Holly, I think I'm just now beginning to figure out who I am and, if I become someone else for a year, I'm not sure I'll ever find out who that person is. I may never get back. It scares me. It scares me more than bullets and knives."

Holly took Gail into her arms and held her close. A part of her couldn't help sigh in relief that it seemed her girlfriend wasn't going to go away, but most of her just wanted to comfort Gail and let how know how much it meant to her that she shared all of this.

"I know who you are, Gail Peck. You are a deeply complex, amazing woman and a damn fine police officer. I'll support you no matter what like I know you'll support me."

"Not taking this could have repercussions. I'll need to tell them soon and it may not be good for me in the long run. Jarvis could take this personally and make my life miserable. Some of them play those kinds of games."

"Then we deal with it. Honey, I know it's hard and I'm not pushing you, but you need to decide what you want. I'll help you in any way I can."

Gail bent down and kissed Holly's arm holding her. "I think I know the best way to handle it, but it's also kind of the worst."

Holly looked a bit bewildered. "Alright, want to share?"

Gail groaned. There was one person that played the white-shirt games better than anyone. Getting that person on her side would change everything. "Oh, you don't want to share in this - believe me. If I want to have my name removed from consideration, then I think I need to pay a visit to my mother tomorrow morning."

Holly didn't quite know how to respond to that. She had heard the stories from Gail in her usual flourish of dramatic flair, but never met the woman herself. Superintendent Peck dealt with her boss' boss, not her. She decided her best course of action was just to hold her girlfriend a little tighter and hope for the best. Tomorrow was going to be an interesting day.

_A/N: As always, thank you very much for the reviews. They inspire me to sit at my keyboard and continue this little story._


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: I think this may be the longest chapter I've ever written, so woo-hoo for me. I've seen a hundred different versions of the Peck parents and I understand the logic of most of them. I went through a number of iterations myself before settling on the Bill and Elaine presented here. I hope you enjoy reading it. As always, thank you for the reviews and I apologize for any typos or grammatical errors. I do re-read these a few times before publishing, but my brain sometimes skips over them. Also, any police departments, policies or procedures in these stories are based solely upon my ability to Google._

**Part 7**

Gail walked up the driveway of her parent's house and was greeted by her father as he was headed for his SUV.

"Hey, Dad."

Bill stopped walking and turned towards his daughter. "Good morning. What brings you here so early? Everything alright?"

Gail nodded. "Just needed to talk to Mom. Thought it would be easier to catch her here."

"Well, you know her; she's doing her usual morning routine of coffee and the paper."

Gail did know that. She and Holly had talked through every scenario Gail could think of last night to try and get her mom on her side about this assignment and they both agreed that the sooner the better and out of uniform for both of them was the best way to at least get started.

Bill walked up to Gail and tipped the bill of the baseball cap she was wearing up so he could get a good look at her face.

"The other guy better look a hell of a lot worse."

Gail gave her dad a slight smile. This was a little game they played. When Gail would come home from school quieter than normal because someone picked on her or with skinned knees from trying to keep up with her brother in the park, her dad would always mention how the other guy must have been so much worse off. She would then come up with some elaborate story about how awesome she was. This time she was pretty sure her father already knew the story behind the black eye, but she played along anyway.

"One arrested and one in rehab. You should have seen the way I threw the criminal clear across the street when he landed on my back. They practically had to scrape him off the concrete."

Her dad smiled and ran his knuckles across her chin. "That's my girl. Did you have a doctor look at that?"

Gail bit the inside of her lip to stop the smile that spread across her face every time she thought of Holly. She was here early in the morning on a mission to get out of the undercover job, not to reveal her relationship with her girlfriend and grinning like a fool at the mention of 'her doctor' was going to certainly tip her dad off to inquire further.

"Yea, Dad. Don't worry; I was cleared by a doctor."

Bill narrowed his eyes a little. "Not one of those bus drivers that gets paid by the stitch right? A real doctor?"

Gail laughed. "Yes, a real one. When did paramedics get on your hit list?"

Bill opened the door and threw his bag in the front seat of the Suburban and started walking around to the driver's side motioning for Gail to follow. "You remember Jacky Newland - Mountie, used to come to poker nights before retiring up north?"

Gail racked her brain. She went through the faces of the cops playing cards in their lounge while she was growing up until one clicked. "Jack the Humpback?"

"Twenty-six years on the job and some idiot spooks his horse with a firecracker and throws him off. The medic on the scene cleared him and now he's 'Jack the Humpback.' Always get a second opinion."

Gail tried not to roll her eyes. Instead she leaned into the window of the driver's side door and kissed her Dad's cheek. "Yes, Daddy."

"Don't sass me, young lady." Bill turned more serious. "The guy going to rehab…the department will make sure he gets very good care, Gail. We've had other officer go through their program and end up doing really well. Unfortunately addiction can be a side effect of this job. He's a decent kid. I wish him the best."

Gail saddened thinking about Chris sitting in some rehab facility probably going through withdrawal. "I thought you didn't like Diaz?"

"I never said that."

"The only time I ever heard you speak to him was when we were dating and you invited him visit the office and look at your extensive gun collection."

"They've been part of our family for generations. I was being nice."

"Were you being nice when you told him start trying to figure out which ones were loaded?"

Bill winked at his daughter. "Well I liked him better than Collins anyway and that one you dated twice."

"When did you start keeping up on my love life? You're as bad as Steve!"

Bill tugged at Gail's ball cap again. "Are you here to talk to your mother about the new person you're dating?"

Gail stomach dropped about twenty-feet and her brain started racing. Her dad said 'person.' This was a man who always chose every word carefully. He knew about Holly and she had no idea how to respond to the casual question. She opened and closed her mouth a few times trying to come up with words.

Bill placed a warm comforting hand on his daughter's shoulder. "Gail, look at me."

Gail did as she was told and lifted her chin to meet the eyes of her father. She kept silent and let her Dad continue.

"Are you happy? Does she make you happy?"

Gail just nodded.

"That's all that matters. I don't care who you date as long as they're good for you. She is right? I can unload the guns?"

Gail smiled. "Yea, you'll like her Dad. She's a total history buff like you. The documentaries you two could prattle on about would take days."

"I like her already."

Gail bit her lip. "How did you know? Does Mom…"

"You know you're old man used to be a pretty good detective. I know how to keep tabs on my children without making it widely known." They both grinned acknowledging the playful dig on Elaine.

"As for your mom, I don't think she knows. She's been underwater working on a new project."

"I wasn't planning on telling her today."

"You should. She should hear it from you. If you talked to her every now and then, she wouldn't find other ways of getting information."

Gail pushed her nails into her thigh to control her response. Her dad and she got along reasonably well, but he could be just as critical of her as her mother. Dating was just not something her dad put a lot of effort into worrying about unless the person didn't live up to his standards for dating a Peck. When it came to the expectations of her career or communicating with her mother though, she was probably never really going to win with either of them.

She decided to tip off her Dad to why she was there since he was going to know soon anyway. "That project she's working on…that's why I'm here."

Bill nodded. "That's between you two. I've voiced my opinion already."

Gail was confused by her father's response. Was he saying he didn't want her to go undercover? Maybe he thought she wasn't ready? She had no idea but knew he wasn't going to elaborate so she just stood there for a second silent.

"Gail, why don't you get inside before the neighbors see you all black and blue and call the police. I don't want to deal with those jerks."

This time Gail reacted with a slight smile. "They're better than the bus drivers though right?"

"Of course! Oh and thank that doctor of yours from me for taking such good care of you."

Before Gail could respond, her Dad put the window up and started to back out of the driveway with a self-satisfied grin on his face.

After a minute of looking up to the heavens for some kind of support, Gail walked into the house and found her mother in her usual morning spot at the dining room table drinking her coffee and reading the paper. Before even really greeting her mom, she walked into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee and then sat down across from her mother.

Elaine tipped a corner of the paper and peered over it getting a good look at her daughter. "Sweetheart, take that hat off in the house. Actually just keep it off unless you are on patrol. It's unbecoming; even if it does cover that chop job you did on your hair. Have you called Francisco about getting that fixed yet?"

Gail swallowed her coffee hard before lifting the cap and placing it on her lap. This was all very typical in the Peck household – no warm greetings or asking what brings you by. Just jump right in and start speaking your critical mind. She decided, however, to give this one to Elaine. She wasn't here to win a battle; she was here for a war.

"Mom…I…"

"Dear god, Gail, your face looks like you were hit by a truck."

Gail subconsciously put her hand up to her left eye somewhat covering her face. "I assume you heard what happened."

Elaine folded the newspaper back to its original condition and set it on the table before reaching for her coffee. "Are you here to talk about Chris Diaz?"

Gail tilted her head and crinkled her brow. Of course she thought about going to her parents to help Chris with the review board after he got out of rehab, but she tried to never use her family connections and honestly didn't think it would help. She couldn't tell by her mother's expression how she was supposed to answer this, which didn't bode well for why she was really there.

"Uh…no. Chris is getting the help he needs, Mom. When he gets out, I'll…"

"You're father and I already discussed this last night. I wish Mr. Diaz a full recovery, but we will not be helping him retain his badge if that's what you're here asking."

Elaine called him 'Mr. Diaz' and not 'Officer Diaz' which clued her into how little her mother planned on getting involved in this situation - she was already writing him off. Gail couldn't help but defend her friend. "I'm not asking. Chris is a good man. He's made some mistakes, but he's trying to own up to them. People deserve second chances, Mother."

"Mr. Diaz very likely brought cocaine into the home of three police officers jeopardizing all their careers. One of which happens to be my daughter. The same daughter he then partnered with while high putting her in danger. Oh and blackening her eye, not to mention a few other bruises I can't see. I support our department policy on helping officers through their struggles with addiction, but I am not in a forgiving mood of that man right now. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am," Gail said shyly. As usual, her plans for talking to her mother were going right out the window. She very seriously thought of bagging the real reason she was there and going to Jarvis instead, but she knew if she did that then she would face retribution from potentially Jarvis and her mother. She needed to go straight to the source. She took another gulp of the coffee and did her best to build-up her courage. Seeing Holly's lopsided grin in her mind encouraging her on was helping a great deal.

"Mom, I'm actually not here to talk about Chris. I'm here about Operation Phoenix."

Elaine lifted a brow in curiosity, but didn't comment. Gail knew that look. This was what Elaine did when she was setting someone up to lead the direction of a conversation. Typically her mother was overly chatty. Steve inherited that from her while Gail was much more of a Peck and followed the 'speak only when needed unless it is going to amuse you' way like her father. Elaine had one exception though – she learned early on in her police career if she wanted a perp to hang themselves it was best just to be silent and let them fill the void. It was a natural human tendency when someone was nervous and she had never been above using the technique with her children. Gail knew this about her mother and had practiced with Holly over their very early morning breakfast on how to react.

Gail gripped the coffee mug a little tighter to stop herself from fidgeting. Her fingers tended to dance from nervous energy and her mother was usually pretty quick to catch it and call her on it. She must have paused a little longer than she thought, because her mother actually spoke first.

"I see John spoke with you."

Gail smiled, "He didn't call you and report in after?"

Elaine didn't hide her grin from her daughter's question. She liked the fact that Gail was observant enough to pick up on office politics and the real hierarchy in the department. It was a good lesson to learn for when she elevated in rank.

"He may have mentioned it. He also mentioned you were vague in your reaction. This is a very important assignment, Gail. Do not take it as cavalier as you have other opportunities. This isn't going to come around again and I would expect you to recognize that."

"I do recognize that, Mother. I know what undercover can do for careers. Steve was promoted immediately after his assignment last year."

"He was. It wasn't easy work, but he was ready and he did an excellent job."

Gail knew that too. She also knew he held a deep sense of regret form not being there for her when she had been abducted and there were sections near the border he could never go back to or he would likely be killed. With every opportunity came cost and the ones associated to this assignment were not ones Gail was willing to make. She needed to remind herself of that fact before she got caught up in her mother's manipulations.

"Yes, he did. Are you running this one?"

Elaine slightly narrowed her eyes at the question as she tried to determine how her daughter was playing this. Gail hadn't come out yet one way or another about whether she wanted the job. Usually she would either bluntly make her opinion known and move on or evade altogether. Instead she was sitting back and casually asking questions. It was a different strategy for Gail and Elaine somewhat admired the growth in her daughter's communication skills.

"I am one of the strategists behind the task force, but I did not choose the candidates if that's what you are asking. You fit the profile and earned the spot on your own."

Gail just shrugged at the remark. She knew half of being picked for undercover work was fitting a predetermined profile. It's how she ended up on the Perick case. At the end of the day, she was likely first short-listed because her body-type, hair and eye color checked off the most boxes in her favor.

"I know you probably think your father or I pulled strings. You always do. We didn't. Besides, you worry too much about your last name, Gail, when you should be proud of it. Being a Peck means you are of the highest standard of police."

Gail couldn't stop herself from muttering, "And with great standard comes great expectation."

"Yes it does. You are part of a legacy. It is in your blood to be exceptional. This assignment will prove that. You need to take this seriously."

Gail took a measured breath and prepared herself for what she knew was going to be a difficult conversation. Nothing her mother had said so far had swayed her from her decision to not do this assignment. She just needed to express that in the best way possible.

"Mom, I've been giving my career a lot of thought lately. I do take this seriously - very much so. I want to make our family proud of my role in the department – of me." Gail paused and met her mother's eyes. She gauged her reaction but saw none and knew she was intentionally leading herself down a path her mother had already laid out for her. She carried on anyway.

"Last month I worked on a case that impacted me greatly. Since then I have used that knowledge to really help determine the direction I want to take my career. You and Dad have always taught me to create opportunity for myself and be the best and that's what I want to do."

Gail intentionally didn't say what it was she wanted. Actually vocalizing career aspirations was something new to her. She wasn't lying when she told her mother she had been thinking about what kind of cop she wanted to be. It had been on her mind more and more since Holly's idiot friend had put down her profession and cemented itself as a permanent resident in her brain after her first encounter with Sophie. The first time she actually spoke about it to anyone was last night with Holly, but now, even just a few hours later, it felt right and she was determined to make it a reality.

Elaine pursed her lips. "These career aspirations of yours…how do they involved this assignment?"

Gail knew her mother didn't have the patience for anymore vagueness. It was time to be straight with her. "They don't. I would like my name removed from consideration. If this operation is going to be as high profile and important as it sounds, it deserves a team of fully engaged personnel. I'm not the right person for this job."

Elaine turned her head slightly but kept her eyes firmly fixed on her daughter. "I have to say, I'm not surprised that this is your reaction. You've always been very good at walking away from what's best for you."

Gail felt the jab straight in her heart. She had just come so very close to losing Holly over that particularly wonderful personality trait of hers and it hurt to see how much it was recognized as one of her standard operating procedures. She reminded herself that she was trying to be better. Her mother might not see it, but Holly did and that's all that mattered.

"That's not what this is. I know what I want, and being undercover is not it."

Elaine sat back in her chair and took a sip of her coffee then looked at her watch. "Well I'm already going to be late so why don't you enlighten my, Gail. Tell me what's more important than spending the next year doing some of the most important police work this city has seen. Work that you are one of only two candidates being considered for after months of going through numerous personnel files and rounds of operational planning. I'll help you help out…your answer better include the words 'chief of police' and 'most decorated.' Both of which you could get by taking this assignment."

Gail resisted the urge to make a sarcastic retort or just run out of the room. She truly hated confronting her mother about anything. Why she thought this was the best course of action was now officially lost to her. If there was an officer exchange program between officers of Toronto and Greenland, she had a feeling she knew what assignment she was next going to be short-listed if her mother decided to make recommendations. She ran her finger around the rim of the coffee mug a few times and decided to tell her mother what she wanted. As Holly reminded her countless times last night and that morning, it was her career and her life – not her parents'.

"Mom, I've given this a lot of thought. I'm not interested in long undercover operations or joining administration right now. I want to join CYAC."

Gail noticed her mother couldn't school her features quick enough to hide her reaction. It was a mix of confusion and surprise. "You want to join the Child and Youth Advocacy Center? You do know that's what CYAC stands for right, Gail?"

Gail bit the inside of her lip in frustration. "Yes, I'm fully aware."

Elaine shook her head. "You want to investigate child abuse? Sweetheart, it's a noble cause, but I've never seen you show any interest in children. The last time I asked when you were going to settle down and start a family, you said, 'when Canada declares war on the United States by annexing the border states' and now you're telling me you're ready to dedicate your career to children?"

Of all the things she had said to her mother throughout the years to get her off her back, Gail had to silently laugh that her mother would remember that one. It was true she had said it, but it still stung a little that her own mother knew so little of the real her.

"Mom, I've worked with a lot of different departments and many types of cases. The ones that impact me the most – that I'm most passionate about are those that involve children. I feel…no, I know that I can represent our family well in CYAC. I know I haven't always been clear on what I've wanted to do…"

"More like floated your way through the last few years, Gail."

"Yes, I'll give you that, but I'm serious about this. This is what I want to pursue."

Elaine sat back and took in the look of determination that crossed her daughter's features. Even with a black eye and hair scattered in five different directions from being under the baseball cap, she looked stoic – she looked like a Peck. For once, Elaine decided to hear her daughter out. She was mad about the undercover assignment, but not as much as she thought she would be. A part of her had expected Gail to try and turn it down but she underestimated her daughter – she hadn't expected her to have such a valid reason. Still she needed to know more about Gail's intentions if she were going to support her child.

"Do you know how long the waiting list for people wanting to join that group? It could take you a year to get in. People want it on their resume to help their political career. We vet them, they get in and then they move on after a few months. The ones that join for personal reasons or love of children wreck themselves after a few exceptionally difficult cases then burnout. It has one of the highest rates of addiction and turnover in the force."

Gail thought about how it would seem odd to most people to hear Elaine Peck speak down about those that were motivated by politics, but Pecks had a disdain for those that didn't truly dedicate themselves to the cause. You could use politics to get ahead, but staying true to the police department was a priority. She needed to prove that she wasn't taking this lightly and could handle the psychological turmoil the job tended to have on people.

"I know how difficult it is to work on these cases…"

"No, Gail, you don't. You think you do because you've been involved on the outskirts in a few here or there. This is every day – defenseless children being treated like garbage by the citizens of this city; babies tortured and little boys and girls being sold like cattle. It will destroy you in months."

Gail leaned her elbows on the table and continued looking at her mother in the eye. She wasn't being confrontational, but she needed the other woman to know how much she wanted this and what she was willing to do to get it. "Then help me. You're always pushing me; wanting me to be better – wanting me to find direction. This is what I want. This is what I've wanted for a while and have been too nervous to admit. It's probably not going to make me chief of police and I may never end up in a white shirt, but I'll work harder at it than I have on anything else. I know people burn out at this all the time, but I don't have to be one of them. Some succeed and you could help me with that if you and Dad supported my decision and me."

Elaine sat in silence for a few minutes unknowingly mimicking her daughter's circling of the coffee cup with her finger. Gail had put her in an interesting position. After years of pushing her to make a career for herself, her daughter appeared to finally make a decision and was asking for her support. Denying it would seem hypocritical, especially when the field she was choosing was so difficult and worthwhile – regardless of whether it shot her up in rank quickly. Still, Elaine Peck was a prideful woman and she couldn't just lose a discussion with her daughter. Caving quickly on getting her out of the operation would be a loss. She needed a compromise.

Elaine sighed. "I'll talk to Staff Sergeant Shaw and for the next month you will be assigned every case and dispatch is going to send you every call involving a child that you can possibly manage. After thirty days, if you haven't pull out whatever hair you have left on that head of yours, then we'll discuss next steps. In the meantime, your name stays on the list for Phoenix. We're not ready to make final decisions yet and I am not about to watch you throw your career down the drain if this is a whim."

Gail wasn't sure how to respond at first. It hadn't been the easiest conversation she had ever had with her mother, but it wasn't the worst by far. "Thank you, Mom. I will not let you down. This is what I want."

Elaine nodded. "Very well. Are we done here? I assume Shaw gave you the day off, but some of us still have to go to work."

Gail knew she should just thank her mother, get up and run out the door when she had the chance, but something in her started screaming to just lay everything out on the table. She puffed her cheeks out with air before deflating them slowly.

"Actually there's something else I want to talk with you about."

Elaine had already started to get out of the chair when she turned to her daughter and sat back down. Whatever confidence Gail had had moments prior had gone right out the window. Her fingers were fidgeting and Elaine could hear the tapping of her foot under the table.

"Should I call in to tell them I'll be late, Gail?"

"Uh…no…uh…look…it's just, well I'm seeing someone and I just thought you should know. You seem to want to know these things." Gail was proud of herself for not using using words like 'meddle' and 'pry.'

Elaine's eyebrow arched up and a smile crossed her face. She wasn't used to her daughter willingly sharing information about her personal life. Maybe she was being rewarded for not coming down too hard on her about Phoenix or maybe there was a catch? Her interest shot up to an all-time high.

"So tell me about this gentleman. Is he one of the suitors I set you up with? You've been avoiding my recommendations for the last few months…did one stand out?"

"Not exactly."

"Sweetheart, you opened this door. Don't act like I am pulling teeth here."

Gail came very close to quipping the door was actually to a big ol' closet, but thankfully caught herself prior. Her mom wasn't a close-minded person, but she did have a lot of expectations from Gail. Expectations Gail had already spent the morning poking holes at and she wasn't sure how dating Holly would fit into them. She mentally kicked herself for starting this now. She was horrible at knowing when to quit while she was ahead.

"Mom, uh..we have been dating for a few months – off and on, but we're definitely back on. I'm committed to this and I wanted you to know."

Elaine sensed the uneasiness from her daughter and it was more than the usual when it came to these types of conversations. Gail was genuinely worried about her reaction to this relationship. She decided to proceed slowly, "Ok. Where did you two meet? Does he have a name, profession, residence?"

Gail paused again.

"Oh dear, you're dating Collins again aren't you?"

Gail's head shot up. "What? No! No, no, no, no! How much of an idiot do you think I am?"

"I thought maybe you were going for that 'third times a charm' deal."

Gail scrunched up her face in disbelief. She then said rather quickly. "Thanks, Mom. No. Look, we met at work. Her name is Holly and she's a forensic pathologist."

This time it was Elaine to pause. Silence floated over the table between the two women for what felt like hours. For all Gail's training and observation skills, she couldn't for the life of her figure out what was going through her mother's head. Elaine then took the phone off the table and called into work to let them know she was going to be late before turning back toward Gail.

"Have you ever dated a…a…uh…forensic pathologist before?"

Gail narrowed her eyes in confusion for a second before catching on what her mother was asking. "No. She would be the first."

"Alright then. Is this something you've thought about for a while?"

Gail smiled and teased, "Dating forensic pathologists? You know I've always had a thing for the dead and figured 'why not!'"

"Gail."

This time Gail softened her tone. "I don't know. Maybe. I've never been closed off to the idea. Dating Holly is just about Holly. I'm not entirely sure what else that means."

"Are you confused by any of this? Uncertain?"

"No, I'm not. Not at all. I just want to be with her."

"In every way?"

Gail shifted in her seat uncomfortably. "Mom, really? We're not having that conversation. Ever."

Elaine ran her hand through her hair and studied her daughter. Gail still had a nervous energy surrounding her waiting for her response, but it eased as soon as she mentioned the name of the woman - Holly. It peaked her curiosity.

"I'm allowed to ask these questions, Gail. You've only ever dated men. This hasn't even been something I've considered about you. Are you sure this isn't just a close friendship? You don't have a lot of friends and maybe…"

"Mom, I'm sure. I'm very sure, okay. I really am not going into the details about why I'm sure, so you're going to have to trust me on this one."

Another awkward silence followed.

"Is this really why you don't want to join Phoenix? This relationship?"

Gail tampered down her defenses and answered calmer than both expected. "No. Holly would have supported the decision to do it. I did it for me. I need to figure out who I am, Mom. What I want so I can be the best possible partner and person I can be. Pretending to be someone else for a year isn't going to help. Plus, I really do plan to apply for CYAC."

Elaine nodded, satisfied with the response. "You said she's a forensic pathologist?"

"Yes."

"In the city? Is her last name Stewart?"

Gail was surprised by the question. She probably shouldn't have been. Her mother made it her job to know who everybody was, but it was still shocking to watch her worlds collide. "You know her?"

"Not personally, but she's handled cases that have crossed my desk. I know her name and reputation. She does very good work. Clearly I didn't know everything about her though."

Their conversation was so far unusually calm and Gail still couldn't get a good read on her mother. In a way, she thought maybe the older woman was going through some kind of shock. She seemed too even keeled for having just learned her daughter was dating another woman – especially for Elaine.

"Mom, if this going to be a problem? I really like her and I want this to work. If you…"

"No. Gail, forgive me if this isn't all just a little surprising. I think you need to let me absorb this, but it's not a problem."

"Okay. That's fair. Thank you."

"I'd like to meet her. I want to understand this change in you."

Gail nodded. "We're still working some things out. I'd like to wait a few weeks before introducing her to the Peck family madness."

Elaine scoffed. "Anyone worth their salt would be honored to have dinner with this family."

Gail just nodded and let the comment pass. Instead she went back to another remark of her mother's. "Meeting Holly…Mom, she's amazing and smart. You'll understand why anyone would want to date her, but it's not really a change in me. Meeting her didn't flip some switch that will be turned off if she were to go away. It's just me, Mom. It's who I am."

Once again Elaine took in her daughter. She really looked at her and, in a way, saw her for the first time. Gone was the shy little girl that hid in the corner and ran through the house crying when her brother would relentlessly chase her. Seating across her was a woman with a quiet confidence that was slowly but firmly suffocating that insecurity that always seemed to plague her. She sat straighter and more aware. There was a determination and drive about her that Elaine had never seen. It was actually quite beautiful to see. She really did need time to absorb this all though. It was certainly not the morning she thought she was going to be having when she woke up.

"I really do need to get to work. This city doesn't just run itself, you know."

Gail recognized that the abruptness to the end of their conversation was her mother's way of trying to process everything. She had a habit of doing the same thing and accepted it for what it was. She mimicked her mother and stood pushing the chair back to the table. "Right, I should get home."

"Leave the baseball cap in the mud room, darling."

Gail laughed. "Yes, Mother."

The two women put on their jackets quietly. Gail went to open the door but was stopped by her mother's hand grabbing her elbow and then pulling her in for a hug. Elaine pulled back before Gail could even really register what had happened. Her mother then lightly ran a finger over her black and blue cheek.

"You are changing, Gail. That's not always a bad thing. You work hard and stay motivated and your father and I will support you."

"I'm going to get this right."

Gail could have been talking about her career or Holly, maybe both. Elaine really didn't know. What she did know was she wasn't going to place her bets against Gail on either.


	8. Chapter 8

Gail walked into The Penny and looked around for her usual crew and easily spotted Dov, Chloe, Andy, Nick and Traci sitting at a table in the back. Before heading over, she checked her phone for any new messages from Holly. They had spoken briefly after she left her parent's house, but a double homicide had buried the morgue with work all day. Gail was hoping a new message would appear on her phone letting her know that Holly's earlier promise to try and meet her there if things cleared was going to happen. So far it didn't look to be the case.

She didn't really feel like being at The Penny this evening, but Dov wanted to get everyone together to talk about Chris so she felt like it was the right thing to do. In truth she was still pretty worn out from her conversation with her mother that morning and her left-side was aching a bit from the fight the other day. All she really wanted to do was curl-up on the couch with Holly and watch mindless television. As she began to walk closer to the table she noticed her brother taking a seat next to Traci and it reminded her of something else she needed to take care of that evening. She suddenly had a renewed burst of energy - seeing Steve in person was going to be a lot more fun than talking to him over the phone.

Gail stealthily maneuvered her way through the crowd until she was standing undetected by Steve on his left-hand side. Just as Andy was about to greet her from across the table, she quickly took Steve's ear between her fingers and started twisting until he half-stood up from pain and shock.

"Ahhh, what the hell? Gail, quit it right now!"

"Hello, brother. Anything you'd like to share with the class?"

Steve tried to twist his body out from under Gail's hold, but it only made her pull tighter. The thing with siblings was they always knew your weakest points, and in this case both were fully aware that Steve lost all physical state-of-being if someone touched his ears. Gail completely had the upper hand.

"Gail, I have no idea what you're talking about! Let go of me!"

Gail took a quick glance around the table and noticed the amused expressions of her friends. At least they were enjoying the show.

"Oh really? You have no idea what I'm talking about? None? Would you like a hint, dear bother?"

Steve tried to grab at Gail's hand but she quickly positioned herself around his back making it very difficult for him to get a good angle. "Yes! Stop it!"

Traci couldn't help by try and get Steve out of this. She was really doing her best to be a supportive girlfriend, but watching him get schooled by Gail was way too funny to be serious. She finally spoke through her laughter, "Come on, Gail. You're going to rip his ear off."

"It would be an improvement to his face. He deserves this. Don't you, Steven!"

"Dammit, what did I do?"

"Let's see…this morning I happened to see our father and he mentioned something to me that I was surprised he knew. Any guesses what that could be or who would have told him?"

Steve's eyes grew twice their size and his eyebrows were somewhere north of his hairline, but he didn't concede. "Gail, I have no idea what you are talking about."

Gail dropped her elbow and hooked her arm around Steve's neck with her one arm and then quickly grabbed his other ear. Considering what was happening they hadn't yet caused a scene, but their table was all but doubled over and beyond curious as to what Steve could have possibly done.

"Here's the thing, brother. Our father doesn't pay that much attention to my daily life and yet he decided to drop some pretty up-to-date information about it. So I thought to myself, Self, how could my dad possibly know this when barely anyone else does. Traci wasn't going to say anything. She's loyal and a good friend."

"Aw, thanks, Gail."

Gail twisted Steve's ear causing him to screech. "You're welcome, Trace. Back to you, brother. Let's see…Oliver knew but I can't imagine him gossiping with one of his superiors over morning smoothies. That leaves you and Nick, and Dad hates Nick."

Nick's head shot up. "What? Wait, he does?"

Gail looked over at Nick and tilted her head. "Twice, Nicholas, twice."

Nick dropped his head again. "Right."

Gail turned her attention back to Steve. "Was that a whimper, Steven? Did you really just whimper? I had a three-hundred pound man use me as his personal crash mat yesterday and I didn't shed one tear at the scene and here you are crying like the little toddler you are over an ear. It's pathetic."

"Alright, alright, whatever I did I'm sorry."

"What did you do?"

Steve stayed silent weighing his options. Peck's were never to give in or admit to something first. It was a family rule.

Gail started taunting him. "Come on, Brother…you know what you did. Just admit it and this can all be over."

Chloe broke the silence that followed, "We should totally let Gail do all interrogations. She's lethal."

Dov responded, "It's been considered, but the department felt there would be too many lawsuits to process."

Traci jumped in, "Yeah, but the streets would be free of crime. Whatever Steve did must have been pretty bad."

Andy added, "I've never been happier to be an only child as I am right now."

Nick laid a twenty on the table. "Gail makes Steve wet himself, takes his beer and still gets him to apologize to her."

Chloe jumped up excitedly and pulled some cash out of her pocket. "Steve ends up in the fetal position under the table and Gail uses him as a footstool while she eats her dinner. He isn't allowed back up until close."

Traci just shook her head at her friends and patted Steve's shoulder while Gail was basically choke-holding her boyfriend. "No, no, no, you all have this all wrong. Steve admits defeat; Gail lets him go and then proceeds to torture him slowly for weeks." She then laid her own twenty on the table as well.

Steve did his best to turn his head in Traci's direction. "Thanks a lot for your support! You could just help me out of this."

Traci just shrugged her shoulders. "There's money on the line now. You're on your own."

Gail listened to her friends joke about her and Steve. After a day like yesterday, it was nice to see them all in good moods, even if the reason behind it was watching the Peck siblings terrorize each other.

"Give in yet, Steve?"

"You're evil!"

"It's not evil when it's justified!"

"Garbage Pail Gail!"

"Really? That's your comeback? Do you want Traci to know your nickname in elementary school?"

"You're twisted, you know that. Mom must have fallen down the stairs when she was pregnant with you. It's the only explanation."

"I'm sorry, brother, did you say twist?" Gail then gave Steve another twist on his ear for good measure. Steve hit his hand on the table to tap out so Gail slightly loosened her grip around his neck. Not enough for him to get away, but enough to show she would give him mercy.

"Go on. Say what you did."

Steve stiffened once more like he was going to fight his sister but loosened again when he saw his sister's hand start to go back to his ear. He finally relented. "Okay, okay! I told Dad about you and Holly. Gail, I had to! You wanted those tickets and I thought it was the best way. He would have found out anyway."

The table grew silent waiting for Gail's response. They all now recognized just how badly Steve may have messed up and Gail deserved whatever reaction she decided to have.

Gail released her hold on Steve and took the chair next to him. Before she could say anything, Traci smacked Steve upside the head and called him and idiot.

Steve rubbed the back of his head. "Gail, I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd care. It's not like you were hiding it."

Gail took Steve's beer from in front of him and made it her own. "That's beside the point. This wasn't something for you to tell him. You're such a gossip queen."

"He didn't care. He just got the tickets and told me to make sure you enjoyed the evening."

"You're still not getting it. Regardless of his reaction, I should have been the one to tell him."

Steve kind of pouted in his defense. "But you never want to talk to them about your dating life. I was helping you."

Gail looked at her brother somewhat dumbfounded. "Don't you think maybe…just maybe telling Dad that I am seeing another woman is a little more in-depth than just my 'dating life?' I mean, I think it's great that all of you seem so fine with it. It's not really a big deal around here which is awesome and may have led you to believe the entire world would be just fine and dandy about this, but you TOLD DAD!"

Steve had the good sense to look well and truly sorry. "Gail, I'm really sorry. I thought you'd be happy you didn't have to do it."

And secretly she was and they both knew it. The Peck family dynamic didn't always follow the same logic as what people would describe as a normal family. Elaine Peck ruled the house and Bill was usually the last to know anything about his children. Steve telling their dad was actually a smart move because it gave Bill an opportunity to form his own opinion before Elaine's could cloud everything. In his own way, Steve was protecting Gail and trying to help her out by getting at least one parent on her side. That didn't mean it couldn't have spectacularly backfired and it certainly didn't mean Gail wasn't going to ensure Steve paid for it. Her getting to torture him over this was part of their mutual deal as siblings. Steve wasn't going to like it, but he was going to accept it for what it was.

Gail shrugged, "Yeah, well what is done is done. Besides, I too was in a sharing mood with Dad so I told him about the 'Incident of 2004.' I mean…he would have found out anyway and you should be happy you didn't have to do it. Right?"

Steve jerked his head quickly in Gail's direction and said under his breath, "No, you didn't."

She looked her brother dead in the eyes. "You wanna to take bets on that?"

Steve gritted his teeth. "We had a deal."

Both siblings kept up their staring contest. "That deal died the day you decided to make me grand marshal of the daddy daughter pride parade, brother."

Steve jumped from his chair and pulled his phone out of his pocket declaring he had some phone calls to make and ran off in the direction of the back door. Gail sat back and took a long pull from her newly pilfered beer satisfied with a job well-done. It really was more enjoyable to do that in person.

Chloe leaned her elbows on the table and stared at Gail. "You have to tell us what the 'Incident of 2004' was."

Gail chuckled. "No, I really don't. That's between Steve and me."

Traci just shook her head bemused by the scene that had played out before her. "You didn't actually tell your dad, did you?"

The blonde tilted her beer towards her friend. "See Traci, this is why you're a good detective. You notice the in-betweens. Of course I didn't tell Dad about it; I'm not a rat. I bet you Steve will by the end of the week though and that's all that matters. Maybe next time he'll learn to keep his trap shut."

"Are you actually mad at him? You have every right to be, but you don't seem all that angry."

Before Gail could answer Traci, Andy weighed in. "You did notice she almost tore the ears off your boyfriend right? That's not being angry?"

Traci and Gail just looked at each other and shrugged before Gail responded. "Uh…you used the word 'almost' instead of 'actually.' That should give you your answer. Steve will create his own punishment and then it'll be over. He's an idiot and a gossip, but whatever." She then decided to change the subject. "Anyone hear how Chris is doing?"

Dov spoke up. "Oliver said there weren't any issues checking him in last night. He can't have visitors or phone calls for the first half of the program, so I guess no more news is good news."

Everyone just quietly nodded their heads in agreement before Dov continued.

"Gail, I was thinking today that we should probably clean out Chris' bedroom. You know, make sure there's nothing…"

Gail tapped Dov's shoulder. "Don't worry about it. I already did it while you were at work - top to bottom and everywhere I could possibly think of. Boys have some weird hiding places so you may want to go over it again with your y chromosome logic."

Chloe asked, "Did you find anything?"

Gail half-grinned, "Well I have to say he has some very unique and specific tastes in porn. It was quite enlightening." She received a few grins in return and then became more serious. "Yeah, I found his stash in two different places and we should probably replace the carpet because the trace isn't going to come out. I talked to Oliver before getting rid of the drugs, just to make sure it was all above board."

Dov nodded, "Thanks. You could've waited; I would've helped."

"I know, but I had the day off, so… Besides, I got a pretty good look at his credit card statements. You can help me pay his share of the rent and utilities this month if you want. If you can't…"

"No, it's fine. I will. How bad was it?"

Gail bit her lip and bobbed her head back and forth a few times. "We'll probably need to pay his share for quite a few months. He's in pretty deep."

Chloe put her arm around Dov's and leaned into him. "I can help. I have some savings…"

Everyone else nodded their support as well. Dov and Gail looked at each other and let their mutual agreement on the subject pass silently between them. Dov answered for them both.

"Thanks, really, but we were fine when he was in Timmons and will be now. Let's just worry about helping him when he gets out."

Andy sighed and pulled at the label on her beer bottle. "How long has this been going on? Why didn't we notice? We're police officers."

Nick shrugged his shoulders and added, "If someone really wants to hide something, they'll find a way. Some of the guys in my platoon became addicts…gambling, sex, drugs…it didn't matter the vice, they used it to get away and went to great lengths to make sure commanders never found out. Think of it this way – people can go years without ever being caught. Chris' bottom could have been a lot worse than what it was." Nick tipped his beer in Gail's direction. "Not that your face would agree."

Gail scrunched her nose and jokingly glared at her ex-boyfriend. "Don't forget I know your school nickname too there soldier boy."

Before Nick could respond, a woman entering the bar caught his attention. He stood up and pushed his betting money in Gail's direction. "If you'll excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, I'm meeting someone here so…"

Gail looked across the bar and dropped her jaw. "That's staci1982! You dog!"

Nick turned red and pointed at Gail in warning. "Don't even think about it, Gail. You stay on this side of the bar."

Gail put her hands up in surrender. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Just remember she likes long walks in the park and Law & Order marathons. Oh, and she's a Sagittarius."

Nick tried to act annoyed but couldn't hide his grin. "Still not in the top ten weirdest conversations." He then turned to walk away.

"Why is it every time I show up, Nick is talking about how weird your conversations are?"

Gail turned and looked up to find Holly standing behind her with a grin and two fresh beers in her hand. Gail didn't bother answering her girlfriend's question. Instead she just pushed Steve's chair out with her foot offering it to Holly and took one of the beers she assumed was for her. They greeted each other with affectionate smiles before Holly turned to say hello to everyone else at the table.

The group soon broke off into smaller conversations, which left Gail and Holly time to chat just the two of them.

"Did your case wrap up?"

Holly shook her head. "No, but we got all the samples to the lab for processing and the techs needed at least twenty-four hours…maybe more, so I decided it was time for a break."

"Good. I'm glad you could come."

"You are?"

Gail looked at Holly suspiciously. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

Holly fidgeted a little. "I don't know. I just thought, you know, it being The Penny with all your friends and this being where we last fought…maybe you were just being nice."

"When do I ever do anything to just be nice? I wouldn't have invited you if I thought that. I want you here."

Holly smiled into her beer bottle before taking a sip. "Okay"

Gail took Holly's hand and looked at her seriously. "Hol, I mean it. I'm in this. No running. No hiding."

Holly smiled again, only this time it was the lop-sided way Gail loved so much. She clinked her bottle to Gail's. "No running. No hiding. It's a deal. So, are you ready to talk about this morning? When we spoke briefly you just said everything was handled."

"Yeah, I didn't really want to get into it over the phone. Here's probably not the best place either." Gail let her eyes move around the table letting Holly know it was about her friends and not her. They weren't really paying attention, but would certainly start if they caught wind of the operation she had discussed with her mother.

Holly watched Gail eye her friends and nodded. "Right. Sorry."

"It went a lot better than expected. She's going to work with me. I'm still not off the list, but I don't think she'll push it."

"Good. That's a start, right?"

"Yeah, it's a start." Gail took another drink then added coyly, "Oh and I told her about us. Actually both my parents now know."

Holly practically choked on her beer. "Ah, wh…you what?"

Gail laughed at her girlfriend's frazzled response. "I'll repeat slowly, Lunchbox." Gail put down her beer and signed her words as she spoke them. "I. Told. My. Mother. About. Our. Relationship. She. Wants. To. Meet. You."

"To kill me?"

Gail deadpanned, "My Father is the one with all the guns in the family and the quick draw. My Mom prefers long drawn-out torture. Or as she likes to call it 'parenting.'"

Holly tilted her head in her standard 'Really, Gail?' move. She didn't even need to speak in order for Gail to shift in her seat and change her tone to one of sincerity. "She asked me if I was confused. Wanted to make sure I hadn't gone insane or something, but overall she took it really well – a lot better than I would have thought actually. It was a little off-putting."

Holly played with her beer bottle and didn't make eye contact with Gail. "Are you? Confused, I mean...not insane. I know the answer to that. You can tell me if you are; it's okay to talk about it, Gail."

Gail hooked her finger under Holly's shin and turned her head towards her, placing a kiss on her lips. "About you? Not for a second."

Holly squeezed her girlfriend's hand and kissed her again. "There's more to this than just me, Gail. Like it or not, people are perceived by their sexuality and you will be too. I just want you to know we can talk about it you ever need to – no matter what you say or think, it's alright."

"I know. I know that. Thank you."

They kissed again before Dov interrupted asking if anyone was up for a round of trivia. Everyone groaned and started making excuses about needing to be somewhere about something. Even Steve, who was beginning to make his way back to the table, had been pulled by Traci to leave with some excuse.

Dov looked at Holly, who had been silent, and gave her puppy dog eyes hoping she would play. Holly in turn looked up at Gail, already standing, and shrugged her shoulders. "Sorry, Dov, I really like trivia but it doesn't look like you have enough people anymore for a game. Maybe next time?"

Gail grabbed Holly's purse for her and handed it over. "What she means, Epstein, is that she would have kicked your ass up and down the bar. She's saving you the humiliation."

Before Holly could refute the claim, Gail had hooked their arms together and was dragging her towards the front door. When she got outside, Holly started to laugh.

"Wow, Dov really knows how to clear a room!"

"You have no idea." Gail placed her hand lovingly on the brunette's cheek and pulled her in kissing her and holding her tight. When they finally separated, Gail licked her lips and kept her forehead pressed to Holly's. "Come home with me."

"To your place?" Holly had been over there a few times to play video games and hang out, but she had never stayed there over night. Thinking back, she realized she hadn't been there since they had started dating – only when they were friends.

Gail smiled shyly. "I know your place is quieter, but…I don't know. It's silly…"

"What? Tell me."

Gail wrapped her arms around her girlfriend's waist and pulled her in a little more. "It's a part of me I don't share. Not really and I want to share it with you. We don't have to…"

Gail was interrupted by Holly leaning in for a searing kiss. It took her breath away and literally made her weak in the knees. When they separated again, Holly ran her fingers along Gail's bangs flipping the ends with her fingers before cupping her hand under the blonde's chin and kissing her lightly once more.

"Let's go home."

They smiled at one another knowing that from that point forward, the word 'home' was not Holly's place or Gail's; it was where the other one was. Home was not a physical structure but the sanctuary they built between them.

_A/N: Thank you for the reviews. I was worried about how Chapter 7 was going to be received, so that you very much for the feedback. I'll be on vacation so don't expect an update for at least a week. Sorry internet people. :-)_


	9. Chapter 9

Gail tapped her fingers on the steering wheel to the tune that had been driving her crazy for the last week. She had taken Sophie to see 'Frozen' at the Saturday matinee and had 'Let It Go' stuck in the head ever since. Not only was it running through her brain every ten minutes but she had mistakenly told her partner for the day, Chloe, about it and now the red head was randomly singing it as well. She was seriously contemplating hitting her forehead off the dash if it all didn't stop soon. Maybe she could just accidentally connect Chloe's forehead with the dash – that would probably improve her mood even more.

Just as she was about to thoroughly enjoy her little fantasy of giving a Disney Princess a concussion, the door to the squad flung open and Chloe jumped inside already talking a mile-a-minute. It took Gail a good few seconds to climb out of her reverie and begin processing any of the words coming out of her partner's mouth.

"Could you please use your human voice, Snow White? I don't want the birds, bunnies and fawn prancing behind our squad following their leader. It will cause a traffic accident."

Chloe just smiled humoring Gail; handed the blonde the coffee she had gone to the street vendor to procure and took a drink of her own. "Mmmm...that's good. Did you and Holly get into a fight? You're being BH-Gail today."

Gail glared at Chloe from above her coffee cup. "What are you talking about? What the hell does 'BH-Gail' mean?"

"You know, there's BH or 'Before Holly Gail' and then there's WH-Gail which is of course 'With Holly.' There was also 'Bynes Gail' for when you had that kinda crazy Amanda Bynes thing going when you two broke up, but that also began with a 'B' so it was confusing and I started to feel bad about using someone's mental illness to describe…"

"Chloe. Shut up."

"Right. So are you two fighting?" Chloe leaned forward and then gently inquired, "Do I need to hide the scissors?"

Gail closed her eyes and took a deep breath as the words 'Let it Go, Let it Go' infiltrated her brain. She really was trying to be a better person. She tried to tell herself that maybe Chloe couldn't help the fact that she was born without any sense of personal space or ability to stay quiet for more than five minute. Maybe if she treated Chloe like one of the children she had been working with in the last few weeks she could get through the day.

She took another cleansing breath. "Holly and I are not fighting. We are perfectly fine and actually doing quite well, thank you."

"Oh, well you're not WH-Gail today."

Gail knew she was going to regret asking this but she couldn't stop herself. "And exactly what is the difference between BH and WH Gail…Uh…I mean me…WH Me?"

Chloe smiled like she had been given a gift. She loved talking about personality traits of other people and Gail, in particular, was a fascinating study. "Well…"

Gail put her hand up in front of Chloe's face. "You know what, I don't want to know. I'm definitely WH-Gail, ugh…WH-ME…me, just me! Alright?" Gail put her coffee cup down and moved the car into traffic trying not to feel guilty about the now sullen teenager-look her partner was projecting.

They sat in silence for a few minutes and Gail let her thoughts wonder again. She was in a bad mood but it wasn't because of Holly. Holly and she were now entering their third week of being back together and it was even better than their first round of dating. Her mood wasn't even because of Chloe. At some point in the last year or so, she had actually come to almost enjoy the wacky stylings of Chloe Price. Not that she would ever admit that aloud to another living soul, but being partnered with her was almost a pleasant experience. Plus, she knew Chloe would always have her back and ultimately that is what made a partnership work.

No. Her mood was the result of two weeks of dealing with some of the worst parents and neglected children she could possibly imagine. Her mother had made good on her promise and spoke with Oliver about getting Gail involved in as many cases involving children as possible. Every day since, Gail had worked with family services, sex crimes, CYAC…if there was a team in 15 working on a case involving a child, Gail was given the assignment. She had helped remove seven children from abuse or neglected homes; been part of a sting to raid a child-labor sweatshop and picked up three runaway teenagers on meth and six underage prostitutes. She was exhausted, broken and her friends were starting to not want to be partnered with her anymore thinking she was actually being punished for something or just had bad luck. They couldn't imagine anyone actually requesting these cases, and Gail hadn't offered any explanation as to why she was getting them. She didn't want people to think she was being given special treatment – even if that treatment involved being handed some of the most emotionally agonizing cases in the division.

She knew her decision to work with children was going to be a trying one, but she underestimated exactly how much. She hated to admit it, but her mother was correct in how difficult it was to work on this cases. Every case took a little more out of you and tried to rip apart your soul. Gail was determined it wouldn't destroy her. She was determined that she could rise above it all and still see the hope that laid somewhere in the underbelly of society and continue to help these children in need. She just needed to find some balance and not let her work come home with her. That, she decided, was what separated those that ran away from CYAC after a few months versus those that committed for the long haul.

It wasn't long before dispatch called in and they spent the next hour responding to a domestic disturbance before returning back to the car.

"Is Holly working on the bombings?"

Gail snapped her head to the right and looked at Chloe as if she totally forgot someone else was in the car with her. "Huh? What?"

"The bombings…you know the case everyone is talking about… Is Holly on the forensics team?"

"Oh. Yes. She's been working on it non-stop for the past week. They need to find that bastard soon before he does even worse damage."

Chloe shook her head in agreement. "The whole city is about to have some kind of collective freak out. Are you upset about not being on the investigation team?"

Gail scrunched her face reflecting the sincere thought she gave the question. "No. It's made seeing my girlfriend a little more difficult, but we're working hard to make the time. I know everyone on the team is doing their best and will find this guy. I don't need to be involved."

Chloe looked a little crestfallen at Gail's response. She was hoping Gail would commiserate with her. "I haven't seen Dov in forever. He really wants to join intelligence and thinks this would be a good way to shine. I miss him. Like _miss_ him, miss him."

"Please do not go into detail of what you miss. I beg you."

In true Chloe fashion, she just changed the topic at lightning speed. "So where do you want to go for lunch, partner?"

"Well, partner, I was going to drop you off at the station; I have somewhere to be. You always eat lunch with Dov. Why is today any different?"

"Uh…did you not just hear me say that he was all about 'bomb team' these days?" Chloe grinned at Gail and pretended like she was an excited little kid. "So! Where are we going? Lunch with Holly? I've never eaten in a morgue before. Is it gross? Do you need to wear gloves or something?"

Gail looked a little mortified. "Do you think we eat sandwiches on an autopsy table? Holly has an office, you know."

"Oh, that makes sense. So lunch with Holly?"

Gail looked up to the sky and silently prayed for patience. "No, and if it was you wouldn't be invited. Actually I don't recall inviting you to anything."

"Come on, Gail, we're partners."

"That doesn't mean I need to feed and entertain you. That's what you're here to do for me."

Chloe peered out the window with a pitiful look. "Fine, just drop me off at the station."

Gail rolled her eyes and momentarily considered calling her parents to apologize for a few particular moments during her childhood…and maybe a few in adulthood too. The sullen moody brat role Chloe could revert to when she wasn't getting her way was one she herself had mastered somewhere around the age of nine. She sighed in resignation.

"Fine, you can come with me but there are rules."

Chloe jumped a little in her seat and actually clapped like a toddler getting a cookie. "Ok, where are we going? Oh, there's this amazing little Italian place a few blocks from here. Their manicotti is to die for."

"Sorry, Princess Buttercup, but negative on the Italian. We're picking up lunch and visiting some friends of mine. One word or look from you and I get to throw you in the back of the squad for the rest of the day. Got it?"

Chloe just nodded in understanding as Gail made a U-turn at the next light to head to lunch. She pulled in front of the sandwich shop and got out heading inside without ever saying a word to Chloe. She knew the red head would follow without question.

Once inside, Gail went straight back to the kitchen and let a confused Chloe trail behind. She quickly spotted the person she was looking for and gave the chef a warm smile.

"Bonjour, René. Comment vas-tu? Préparer le déjeuner?"

The chef looked up and grinned at the two women standing before him. He took off his gloves and walked forward to hug Gail. "Très bon! Oui! Oui! Officer Peck, always good to see you, mon ami! Mickey is just boxing everything up." He then turned to Chloe. "I don't believe we have met, Officer. I am René Miot, owner of this petit café."

Chloe returned the greeting and introduced herself all the while taking in how comfortable Gail seemed to be around this man. She was a bit confused as to what they were doing there but smiled knowing she was being let in on some mystery into the life of Gail Peck.

"René, Officer Price is joining my lunch crew today. Could you please…"

René interrupted. "Bien sûr, of course. Come with me, Officer, and let's make you a lunch you won't forget! Have you ever had Haitian cuisine before?"

Gail stood contently as she watched René show Chloe around the kitchen began boxing up a few items she picked out for her meal. She took the time to check her phone and read the series of text messages from Holly making jokes, complaining about not having time to come with her to lunch and making plans for dinner that night. She typed off a few responses before Mickey came out with the box offering to take it to her car. She thanked him and told him she would follow him out, but first wanted to say good-bye to her friend.

René walked back over to Gail adjoined by a very happy Chloe. Gail couldn't help but smile at the enthusiasm her partner had for trying Haitian food. Plus René looked very proud to introduce someone new to his cooking, which made her happy.

René kissed Gail on both her cheeks to say good-bye. "Thank you, Officer Peck. Mickey should have everything else for you. This Saturday, I am doing a special couples' dinner in celebration of love. People who just celebrate finding their soul mates on Valentine's Day are fools. You must come and bring my favorite doctor."

Gail chuckled. "You met her once, René, and already she's your favorite! And how do you know if she's my soul mate? Maybe she's just my date-of-the-month."

The chef winked, "Officer Peck, le coeur sait ce qu'il sait."

Chloe jumped in, "Yes, Gail, the heart knows."

Gail just shook her head bemused and waved good-bye to René. "Merci, René. I'll see you next Tuesday. Come on, Price, we have people to see."

Gail closed the back door of the squad and tipped Mickey for his help before joining Chloe back in the car. She immediately started it and began driving to their next destination waiting for the hundred questions she knew her partner was going to ask.

It took about seven seconds for Chloe to start. "I love this! It's like a mystery lunch! So, who's René…obviously he knows you. He even knows Holly. Oh, and you never paid him. Wait, you know we can't accept free stuff, right? I mean, I'm sure you know…"

"Chloe…"

"Shut up?"

"Yea."

"But…"

"Fine; Chris and I met René three years ago when his restaurant was robbed. He makes magical fried plantains so of course I kept in touch. For your information, I have an open account I pay off at the end of each month. Exactly how stupid do you think I am?"

Chloe had the good sense to look apologetic. "I didn't actually think. Well, it's just there are lunches for like ten people and it all seemed so well orchestrated."

Gail rolled her eyes. She had no idea why she was sharing today, but for the thousandth time she reminded herself that she was trying to be better and people actually seemed to enjoy hearing about other people's lives - for whatever reason she couldn't fathom a guess.

"We've had this arrangement twice a week for the last month or so. Sometimes lunch, sometimes dinner, alright? Happy now?"

"Yep. Where to next?"

"Next is a place I like to visit called Quiet Town, Chloe. Try not to get lost as we pass through."

Chloe took the hint and they remained silent until Gail pulled up to a yellow brick house not too far from René's café. The red head took one of the boxes dutifully from her partner before following Gail up the walk. The door opened before either could knock and a little girl around the age of three came barreling through wrapping her arms around Gail's legs chirping 'Office Gail! Officer Gail!' Chloe's jaw dropped at the scene before her.

Gail shifted so the little girl was only grabbing one leg and began shuffling inside. "Hanna-banana, you crazy little munchkin! Give me my legs back or lunch is going to end up on the floor!" She looked up and greeted the kind woman holding the door open for them. "Good afternoon, Mrs. Jackson. I have a banana stuck to my leg. Help!"

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Amelia, Officer Peck?" Amelia reached down and picked up the little girl twirling her around before hoisting her on her hip.

Gail smiled back, "Probably around the same number of times I have to tell you to call me Gail. Ma'am, this is my partner, Office Chloe Price. She's joining us for lunch. Where's Hanna's partners-in-crime?"

Gail and Hanna made silly faces at one another as Amelia answered. "The older ones are out back playing with Jessica and I just put the baby down for her nap. They're all excited for lunch. It's such a nice day; I thought we could eat at the picnic table."

Gail looked to Chloe and both nodded in agreement. As they walked to the back of the house, Chloe couldn't help but listen in as she heard Gail ask about, who she assumed, were the other girls living in the home. One name, in particular, caught her attention. She remembered a case from when she first came back after the shooting with a little girl named Sophie. It was part of the file Oliver had been chasing Gail down to get during her shopping frenzy of 2014.

Things were starting to add up – this was a group home for orphaned girls and Amelia Jackson was running it along with an assistant named Jessica. Gail must visit at least twice a week based on the number of times she said she got food from René. She smiled to herself. She really was learning a lot today about the mystery that is Gail Peck. Before she could think too much about it, they were standing in the backyard putting the food down with four girls between the ages of about six and ten all crowding around them. It was chaos and the girls all seemed to know and love Gail who acknowledged each by name as she handed them their lunch. Chloe was once again taken aback by the sight before her.

Gail listened to the high-pitched silly stories about each girl's day before diverting her attention to the one she was mostly here to see. Before getting up she introduced the chattering girls to Chloe who immediately jumped right in joining the conversation. Gail stood and grabbed one of the boxes along with her own and made eye contact with Amelia, letting her know where she was going.

Off to the left-side of the yard sat Sophie, by herself, dangling her legs off the wall bundled in her jacket. Gail's heart broke a little watching the little girl, lost in thought, looking down at some piece of paper. As she approached, Sophie looked up and smiled a bit before folding the paper into her pocket. Gail hopped up onto the wall and passed over one of the boxes to her friend.

"Hey, Soph."

"Hey."

Gail pulled a fork out of her coat and handed it over. "I got your favorite. René said he made the plantains extra special just for you."

Sophie barely looked up as she accepted the fork. 'Thanks' was all she said before opening the box and eating silently.

They sat together for a few minutes munching on their lunches. Gail quickly put her fork in Sophie's lunchbox and pilfered on of the plantains. She leaned into Sophie with a grin and held up the fruit. "Too fast for you, kid. Be careful, I may steal them all!"

Sophie just pushed her box closer to Gail showing she didn't really care. Gail frowned. "Hey, what's going on today, huh? Mrs. Jackson said you've been down in the dumps. Something happen?"

Sophie shook her head and wiped her face with the sleeve of her coat. "I'm fine."

Gail bit the inside of her lip. This is what people must feel like in trying to deal with her sometimes. She tried to think of the best way to get Sophie to open up. She knew from Amelia the little girl was having a bad day, but she didn't know why. Of course she could be missing her mom more than usual, but even when Sophie was sad about that she was pretty open and bright with Gail. This was something else.

Gail placed her lunch to the side and bumped her shoulder with Sophie's. "You can tell me anything, you know; no matter what."

Sophie just nodded and pushed her rice around with the fork. The sat quietly for a few more minutes before Sophie asked just barely above a whisper, "Where's Albany?"

Gail was more than a little confused by the question, but was happy it seemed Sophie was ready to talk. She was still learning a lot about how to communicate with people, even if children seemed to come a little easier, but she was pretty sure she wasn't supposed to just give the latitude and longitude to Sophie's question like she normally would have been inclined to do.

"Sweetie, why do you want to know where Albany is? Was someone talking about it?"

Sophie shrugged her shoulders and pulled out the piece of paper form her pocket. Gail looked down and saw it was a torn out page from a book and had a map of Canada printed on it.

"I looked everywhere, but I can't find it. I think I spelled it right, but it's not on here."

Sophie sounded anxious, frustrated and sad. Gail had a feeling if she just told the little girl where Albany really was without knowing the full story, it was going to cause some issue. She decided to dig a little more. She pointed to the top of the page to the scribble of an eight-year old. "You spelled it exactly right, sweetie. Good job. Why are you looking for Albany, huh?"

Sophie dug deeper into her jacket and softly responded. "I heard Mrs. Jackson and the social worker talking last night. They found my mom has a sister in this place, Albany, and are talking to her about sending me there." Sophie started crying, "I can't find it on the map! I looked everywhere and I can't find it! Where is it? I don't want to go. I didn't even know my mom had a sister. What if she's mean? Why can't I just stay here?"

Gail's heart about shattered into a thousand pieces seeing the girl she had become so fond of look so distraught. She wanted to cry along with her and selfishly hold her tight and never let go, but she knew she had to be the adult. She had to make this right for Sophie because, in some way, a promise was passed between Trina and her on that floor of the laundry room - a promise to watch over this child. Gail put her arm around Sophie and pulled her in close. She took the paper from the little girl and pointed off the map southeast of Lake Ontario.

"Sweetie, Albany isn't on this map because it is in New York, United States. See, not too far from Toronto. I don't know why you've never met your Aunt, but I promise you we won't let you stay with her until we are sure she is a good person."

"I just want to stay here. My mom and I lived here. Why can't I grow up here and see you and stay with Mrs. Jackson?"

Gail took a deep breath. Of all the children she dealt with in the last two weeks, this was the one that hit her hardest and deepest. This little girl she loved and, if she had to, letting her go was going to be one of the hardest things she ever did.

"I know it's hard. Really, really hard and I don't know the full story yet, so I can't say what's going to happen. Sophie, Mrs. Jackson, Mrs. Lawrence - your social worker, and I are all looking out for you and want nothing but the best home possible for you to grow up in. Maybe your Aunt could be that person. Maybe she could give you a great place to love, a good school, and lots of friends to play with. I know it seems far away, but this could be a good thing. Let's find out together."

Gail wiped the tears from Sophie's cheeks and hopped off the wall. She stood in front of the little girl and hugged her tight.

Sophie gave her a small smile. "Thank you, Ms. Gail."

Gail touched Sophie's nose with her finger. "I'll talk to Mrs. Jackson. We'll make sure you know what's going on from now on. No more listening to adult conversations and getting scared without knowing the full story. Okay?"

Sophie nodded and let Gail help her off the wall. They walked back to the rest of the group swinging their held-hands between them. Gail grinned at the sight of Chloe getting her hair braided by the two older girls.

"Officer Chloe, when you're done in the beauty shop, we're going to need to head out."

Chloe laughed clearly enjoying her lunch and responding in a sing-song manner. "Yes, Officer Gail."

Gail nodded. "Meet me at the car in a few. I'd like to speak with Mrs. Jackson before I go." Once Chloe agreed, Gail said her good-byes to each of the girls and hugged Sophie tight letting her know she didn't need to worry.

Ten minutes later, Chloe bounced into the squad car playing with the bow one of the girls, Meg, and tied into her hair. She full-on grinned at Gail. "Gail Peck, you are a softy! Those girls adore you."

Gail started the car and drove off in the direction of the precinct. "Chloe, did we not discuss how you could end up in the back of this car for the remainder of shift?"

"Whatever, I know the real you now. You do this a lot don't you?"

Gail just remained quiet. She was worried about Sophie and this aunt in Albany family services had found. She wanted to get back to the station and do some research on her own. Even though this woman lived in Albany, it appeared as if she was still a Canadian citizen, so she had a few avenues to look into. She was glad Chloe enjoyed their lunch, but she really didn't want to go ten rounds about it at the moment.

"Chloe, can we please just continue with our shift?"

Chloe observed her partner and friend. She had noticed the conversation Gail had with Sophie and, although she didn't know the context, she knew the little girl had been upset. Whatever it was had clearly impacted Gail too.

"Yea, of course. Can I just say one more thing? Or two…two things?"

Dispatch interrupted with a call for support on a traffic incident. Gail accepted the call then said to Chloe, "You have three minutes until we're on scene. Go."

"So, first thank you for including me today. It was a lot of fun. Those girls are really sweet."

Gail softened, "Yes, they are. You're welcome."

"I'm sorry I called you a terrible person once. You're not. You don't show it to everyone, and I think I get why now, but well…you're not cold or mean. You can be mean-like sometimes, but you're not terrible. Helping that little girl is an amazing thing and I hope you know…."

"Chloe…"

"Shut up?"

"Yea."

* * *

_A/N: So this chapter isn't about Holly and Gail...my apologies. Ultimately I tend to write these little stories about the growth of Gail and I wanted to show that other people could see it too. That her world was more involved than just riding sidecar to Nick or Andy or being Holly's girlfriend. Hope you enjoy. I love reviews and such. Thank you all for them and please continue. All feedback is welcome and appreciated. _


	10. Chapter 10

Holly stirred the noodles over the stove and tested one to see if it was done. They still had a few minutes so she turned to finish preparing the salad at the counter. As she began cutting the cucumbers, she heard the key in the door knob and Gail fumble her way into the kitchen. Holly lightly chuckled as she watched Gail attempt to place her bag on the hook for the third time before just dropping it on the ground near her shoes. Gail could shoot a target probably blind-folded at fifty-yards, but a standard hook at a doorway seemed out of her depth. For as stealthy as the blonde could be on the job or when she wanted to escape from the world; she could be as equally clumsy and destructive - one of the many enigmas that made her girlfriend so damn lovable and complicated.

Holly closed her eyes and melted into the embrace of Gail suddenly behind her, wrapping her arms around her waist and kissing her neck. She could literally stand like this for the rest of her life and be content. Well maybe without the sounds of Gail's stomach growling…

"Hey, Lunchbox."

"Hey you, dinner's almost ready."

Gail just murmured okay before taking a step back away from Holly and moving to the other side of the counter across from her girlfriend. Holly could feel the loss of contact from her head to her toes. When she looked up from the cutting board and take in the site of Gail for the first time, she was momentarily struck by the distant look in Gail's eyes. It was if the blonde was in the room, but not actually there. Holly had thought she had finally cataloged all the moods and looks of her girlfriend, but this one was new. There wasn't anger, but there was a sense of sadness that wasn't evident when Gail had left this morning for work. What she had learned from observing the blonde was that if Gail didn't come right out and tell her what was wrong, it would likely explode in some other way. Holly had a feeling the evening wasn't going to just be food and a funny movie.

Gail snagged a cucumber off the cutting board and played with it before popping the slice into her mouth. "Hey, do you mind if I use your iPad?"

"Of course not; it's on the coffee table. You know the password. You know you don't need to ask…"

Gail just shrugged her shoulders and walked over to grab the device. When she came back her head was already down looking at whatever she was searching for.

After a few minutes of quiet, Holly couldn't help but interrupt Gail's elected solitude. "If you're looking at porn, as the owner of the iPad I expect sharing and potentially demonstration... actually definitely demonstration."

Gail didn't look up, but Holly was happy to see a small smile cross her face. "Har har, I'm not looking at porn, ya' perv. I'm looking at apartments. I don't know, maybe a house or condo or something."

"You're thinking of moving out of boystown? Why? I thought you liked it there?"

Gail shrugged, "I do, but every night can't be meat cocktails and video games. I need to grow up eventually. Besides, my mom is probably right; if Chris falls off the wagon and brings drugs into our home again, we could all lose our badges. I want to help him, but three unemployed cops or, even worse, three incarcerated cops aren't going to do anyone any good."

Holly looked up to the ceiling in confusion by the fact that Gail just said that her mother was right about something. She thought about going down that path of conversation but knew it would likely not end well. Instead she nodded then tilted her head to the side with a smile before turning back to the stove.

"What is 'a something' beyond apartment, condo or house?"

"Flat, studio, townhouse, building, shed, complex, compound, skyscraper…shall I go on?"

Holly called out over her shoulder, "You're going to buy a skyscraper there, Lady Warbucks?"

Gail smiled and countered, "On Fifth Avenue, number one Fifth Avenue!"

Holly laughed at Gail's immediate return volley from the movie, _Annie,_ and continued to play along. Maybe the banter would give a little more light to the blonde's currently gray eyes. "Don't you need to go all the way to 987?"

"Eh, the commute to work would be a killer."

"If you have enough funds to buy a skyscraper, why have a job at all?"

"You think the city is just going to protect itself, Holly?"

The brunette turned and dropped a noodle in front of Gail for her to test and bent over the counter to place a kiss on her girlfriend's waiting lips. She leaned back just enough to look into Gail's eyes and whisper, "I'm mistaken, you're not a Warbucks, you're a Wayne." She then bobbed her eyebrows up and down and added, "Please tell me you have a leather bat suit."

Gail closed the distance between them again and kissed Holly more passionately than the first. When she pulled back, she hit the noodle on Holly's nose before taking a bite. "You are such a nerd. Of course your sexual fantasies involve superheroes. There's a Green Lantern suit buried somewhere in your closet, isn't there?"

Holly kissed Gail's nose and shimmied back to the stove. "Oh, wouldn't you like to know, officer."

Instead of continuing down the path of sexual innuendo and seduction, Holly was a bit surprised Gail changed the subject and flatly responded, "The noodles are done. What are you making anyway?"

Holly lifted the pot and dumped the pasta into the strainer as she answered "Well, I thought since I've been so busy with the bombing investigation and we haven't really had a chance to eat together, it would be nice to have some comfort food. I have spaghetti sauce for…"

Holly watched as Gail's demeanor changed and she gave the brunette a look of agitation as she interrupted, "I'm allergic to tomatoes, Holly. I thought you knew that. No, I know you knew that. You even commented on it the other day. I guess I'll find something else. Whatever." Gail shook her head and started loudly rummaging through the drawer of take-out menus.

Holly stood in the kitchen dumbfounded. She should have expected this needle-pin turn in Gail's mood. She saw it coming from the second her girlfriend walked in the door but that didn't mean she wasn't still shocked by it and more than a little ticked off.

"Hey, Gail?" Holly said between her clenched teeth.

Gail just continued looking through the menus. "What?"

Holly walked back over to the stove and stuck a spoon into one of the pots before coming over and standing very close to Gail. "What is this?"

"Huh?"

"On the spoon…what is it?"

Gail finally stopped flipping through the menus and looked up at Holly and then the spoon. She then looked down apologetically.

"Waiting for an answer, dear."

"It's cheese sauce." Gail mumbled.

"Yes, because I made spaghetti sauce for me and cheese sauce for you - my girlfriend - whom I know intimately. Who I'm not trying to give a head-to-toe rash or potentially send into anaphylactic shock - depending on the concentration - from ingesting tomatoes…or Ibuprofen, or citrus fruits, or certain laundry detergents, or Red Dye #40, or…"

"Okay, I get it. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."

Both women stood quietly for a few moments before Holly placed the spoon on the counter and put her hand on Gail's shoulder running up her neck and back down again.

"Hey, what's going on? Why did you snap at me?"

Gail shook her head. "I don't know. I'm sorry. Look, maybe I should just go. I shouldn't have…"

"No. You don't get to do that. That was the deal. Remember? No running. No hiding. Talk to me; what happened today that put you in this funk?"

Holly knew the last few weeks had been difficult for Gail. The cases she was being given to prove herself for CYAC where very hard to handle. In truth, they had been hard on Holly too. In an effort to work on their relationship and communicate more they had begun to share details of the cases they were working on and some of Gail's were downright disturbing. This was the first evening though she saw an actual darkness cross her girlfriend's features.

Gail exhaled and stopped her hand from fidgeting. "Hol, can I just…can I just take a minute? I won't go far - just walk around the block or something. I'm not running, I swear, I just need a few minutes and then we can have dinner and talk."

Holly nodded silently and felt her body relax when Gail softly caressed her cheek and kissed her gently before putting on her boots. She bit her lip to stop herself from smiling when Gail reached into her purse, grabbed her keys and deliberately placed them on the hook a bit dramatically for Holly to see.

About fifteen minutes later, Holly looked up from her spot on the couch when she heard Gail walk back into the house. The blonde immediately walked over and placed a kiss atop the brunette's head before taking a seat down next to her.

"Hol, I'm sorry for being an idiot before. It was thoughtless and quick-tempered. I'm really trying to work on that."

Holly grabbed Gail's hand and kissed it before responding. "Gail, you clearly had a bad day. I have bad days too, but I really don't want us taking it out on each other. It's not healthy and it's not fair."

Gail bit her bottom lip and nodded in affirmation. "I know. I know that." She then looked over at the counter. "You could've started without me. Your dinner is probably cold."

Holly got up and walked over to the food. "It's fine. I threw part of it in the oven. Why don't we eat?"

They prepared the rest of dinner mostly in comfortable silence. While eating Gail asked about Holly's day and let her ramble on about her cases and the gossip in the lab. As they relaxed on the couch finishing their meal, Holly was pleasantly surprised to see Gail put her plate on the table and begin talking without a prompt.

"They found someone in Albany related to Sophie – an Aunt on her mother's side. Family services is speaking with her and running background checks to see if she's a viable option to adopt her."

Holly took a deep breath. She was afraid something like this was going to happen. Not for Sophie, or course – she had met her once when she joined Gail on one of her lunch visits and was grateful that maybe they were finding a home for the sweet little girl. What she was afraid of was the bond Gail had formed with Sophie and the potential for it to be broken. Holly had watched over time how Gail had matured and become more open since they had first met in the woods. Holly had also grown during that time. Having Sophie taken away could be enough of an emotional rollercoaster to test that growth in both of them.

Holly reached out and linked her fingers with Gail's. "I thought she didn't have any family?"

"I thought so too. I did the research, Hol, it's not like I didn't want her to have family."

"I know, honey, I know."

Gail stood and started pacing in front of the couch. "Her father was never named on her birth certificate and her mother's records were hard to track because she immigrated to Canada twelve years ago. I looked for relatives in the records and asked as many people that would talk to me at the housing complex. I never found anyone."

Holly remained seated and let Gail pace to release some of her pent-up energy. "How did they find her then?"

"Immigration finally responded back to family services. Her aunt's last name is Oduya, not Shandon, so apparently it was harder to link." Gail huffed loudly to show how not impressed she was by the competence of the immigration department.

Holly pushed her glasses up, "Like the hockey player?"

"Huh?"

"Johnny Oduya, defenseman for the Blackhawks, played for Winnipeg." Holly stopped herself and scrunched her face apologetically, "You don't really care about that do you?"

Gail tilted her head and closed her eyes for a second. "As much as I love kissing you to stop your nervous rambling…"

"I know. I'm sorry - horrible habit."

"No, cute habit…habit that has led to many rather enjoyable and energetic evenings, but, yeah, now is probably not the time."

"Right." Holly twirled her finger in the air. "Back to immigration being morons or more importantly, Sophie having an aunt."

Gail sat back down and twisted her legs together like a pretzel. "There isn't much else to tell. I spoke with Mrs. Jackson and there's a still a lot of paperwork and interviews that need to happen. This woman being in the United States makes it more complicated, but…I mean…it's her aunt right? In the end, you know they'll try and make sure she's with family."

"Is the aunt willing to move back here?"

Gail rubbed her hands over her face and shook her head. "No. She has a husband, job and two kids of her own. She left before Sophie was born. Hol, Sophie doesn't even know her. She didn't even know she existed. She might as well be a stranger - a stranger that lives in another country!"

Holly had a feeling they were entering the landmine portion of the conversation. She knew how much Sophie meant to Gail and she needed her girlfriend to talk this one out or it would eat away and consume her.

"Honey, I don't know what is right or wrong here, but this woman knew Sophie's mother – was her family. That could be important for her."

This time it was Gail that linked their fingers together as she tried not to cry. "I just want what's best for her. I've grown really fond of that little girl."

Holly silently nodded in understanding. Gail wasn't one to express emotion very well. Even now when Gail wanted to use the word love, she chose fond instead as some small way of distancing herself from eventual heartbreak. Just like Holly knew, had known, for some time her girlfriend was in love with her, Gail had resisted saying the words so Holly held back and waited, not wanting to overwhelm their reclaimed relationship by saying it first.

Holly watched as Gail shifted nervously on the couch. She thought back to earlier when Gail was looking for a new place to live and she now had a funny feeling she knew what her girlfriend was going to say next and felt her stomach clench in anticipation Not because the two of them potentially were going to end up in an argument, but because she felt like her girlfriend was setting herself up for serious despair.

"Hol, what if…what if…"

"Gail…"

Holly watched Gail's gaze lay upon her. She could feel the intensity of the air between them.

"She's a great kid. She's been through so much and the idea of her being sent to live with some stranger in the States. It kinda kills me." Gail then flippantly added with a half-smirk, "I mean, who wants to move to the United States from Canada? Yeah the loud, crazy party downstairs with the kids who think they're super popular is a lot of fun for a while, but sooner or later you want to move back upstairs with the grown-ups and enjoy your free access to healthcare and significant decrease in weapons of mass destruction. Right?"

Holly twisted their linked hands back-and-forth for a moment trying to decide how to answer her girlfriend. The easiest would be jump on the out Gail just handed her and joke about the difference between the two countries, but both knew that wasn't going to lead anywhere.

"Honey, this isn't a baby we're talking about. It's an eight year old. There's no learning curve. You can't just worry about feeding her, changing her and making sure her head doesn't roll off her neck. Babies forget when your new at this and you screw up in the first year, little girls don't."

Gail's eyes kind of crossed and the side of her lip contorted up. "Hol? The neck thing? What the…"

Holly threw her arms up in surrender at the odd tangent the conversation just took. "I don't know. I haven't spent that much time around babies, okay? When my brother was born, my parent's kept telling people to hold his head and support his neck. I may have spent the better part of my childhood thinking a baby's head could roll off."

"You graduated top of your medical school? Really? Just roll onto the carpet like a volleyball?"

Holly huffed, "I don't think that now, Gail! I mean, yeah, you need to support their neck, but not because their head will just roll."

"If you were at the top of your class, I'm never going to a doctor again. What do the lesser-of-the-nerds think about anatomy?"

"Can we please get back to the conversation at hand?"

Gail lifted her eyebrows and side-glanced over to Holly. "Oh yeah, but we'll be coming back to the head roll thing at a later date, that's for sure."

"Gail, this is serious. You need to really think about all of this before reacting. I know you care about Sophie a great deal, and you're right, she's an amazing child, but this little girl can't be a spur of the moment decision. You would potentially be placing her in a custody battle and we both know who typically wins those – blood relatives."

Gail jumped back up off the couch agitated. Holly could tell it wasn't being directed at here, but the situation itself. "You don't think I know that? That is hasn't run through my head a thousand times since lunch. I know I have nothing to offer her. I'm a single woman in a dangerous job proven by the fact that I have been shot at and kidnapped. I live in 'boystown' as you call it. I've spent the better part of the last few years hanging out in a bar. Oh, and I recently came out to my parents – which at nineteen is one thing, but at twenty-nine may be used to show that I'm not super in touch with my own brain. Any and all of this could be used against me. I get it!"

Holly got up and stood in-front of Gail. "That is _not what I just said!"_

"You didn't need to say it, Holly! I know it's what you're thinking. It's what I'm thinking!"

"No, it's not what I'm thinking! Yes, you have a dangerous job, a very dangerous one, but cops have children all the time. Hell, your parents did and, I have to say, I'm damn grateful for that!"

"My parents didn't have to get approval from ten different government agencies to have me."

Holly took a calming breath and reached out Gail; happy the blonde didn't resist her touch. "No, they didn't. You're not perfect, no one is, but you're not even close to being the person you just so negatively described."

Gail looked down at her feet. "Nothing I said was untrue."

"Maybe not in facts, but you're perception of it was. You are so much more than the sum of those parts. Oh and the single thing. Last I checked you were in a relationship."

"We're not married or even living together. The courts would see me as single, Holly."

"Maybe, but what you are talking about affects me too here. Don't forget that."

Gail paused and stood still reflecting on what Holly just said. "I'm sorry. Sophie came into my life when you weren't in it and I just…I guess I didn't…I was being selfish."

"I wouldn't say selfish. I mean we just started getting back on track a few weeks ago and you did just find out about this today but…"

"I was being selfish, or maybe just self-involved."

Holly just shrugged her shoulders in silent agreement.

"Would you…With Sophie...Would you consider having her in your life more permanently?"

Holly adjusted her glasses and took a deep breath. "Gail, I thought we were going to have pasta and watch _The Goonies_ tonight and instead we are talking about adopting a child. I don't think I can answer that definitively. This is something that takes a lot of contemplation and discussion."

"Yes, but would you even contemplate it?"

"I'm not sure it's very fair to put me on the spot here."

Gail just stood silent.

This time it was Holly that started to pace. "I've thought about it, okay. Not specifically Sophie… Alright that's kind of a lie. When I met her, the image of us all being a family may have crossed my mind, but in my defense you are ridiculously good with that child and I am human. So, yes, I would contemplate it, but so much would have to happen first and ideally not three-weeks after getting back together."

"I know the timing of this isn't perfect."

"No, Gail, the timing of this sucks."

"I want you to know I contemplate it too – the family thing with you. And not just because of Sophie. I know we still have a lot to work on, but I meant it when I said I was in this. I'm very fond of you, Holly Stewart.

"I'm very fond of you too, Gail Peck. You're an amazing person and will someday make an even more amazing mother. I just don't want to see your heart get crushed if you pursue this and I'm really afraid it will."

Gail started to cry and said under her breath, "I love her, Holly, and I don't know if I'm strong enough to watch her go. I know I'm supposed to be the adult, but it already hurts so much."

Holly wrapped her arms around Gail and held her tight. "I know. I know you love her and I love that you do. You have such a big heart and what you've done for that little girl will change her life forever – it already has. You gave her a safe place to be after her mother died. She could have been lost into the system, but you made sure she wasn't. You've looked out for her and cared for her in every way you could. I'm not saying you couldn't also be a mother to her, because I know you have that in you, but maybe – as hard as it may be – maybe this other woman is supposed to be that person instead."

Holly felt Gail grab onto the back of her sweater and hold it for dear life as her crying compounded. Holly could barely make out the words her girlfriend was saying.

"My brain knows that, but I don't know how to accept it. I want her in my life. I want to be there for her and she's going to go away. It's stupid! She's eight years old and I've known her for such a short time, but my heart of already ripping out of my chest just thinking about it. I've loved so few people in my life – really let them in. I kept thinking today about when I lost you and how it almost killed me. But with you, we found a way back. If she leaves, there isn't any return is there?"

Holly placed her hands on both sides of her girlfriend's face and held her lovingly until Gail's sobs calmed. "Look at me. The logical thing would be to tell you that you can still keep in touch with her. Phone calls, Skype, we can visit and all that, but you know all of this already and it isn't going to ease your pain." Gail just shook her head 'no' and continued to cry softly as Holly continued.

"I think you need to let this play through with the aunt and be there for Sophie as much as possible. She's going to be scared and confused by all of this and will look to you for help. As hard as it's going to be, you can really make a difference in how she adjusts to all of this. You can really help her and it may not be your home or our home that she ends up in; but, baby, you will be giving that child a home and that is the greatest gift anyone could ever give someone else."

"When her mother died, it felt like she passed on the promise to love and protect Sophie onto me. What if this is breaking that promise?"

"It isn't. It isn't because I know you would never do anything in your power to allow that child even one moment of unhappiness if it can be prevented. Sophie isn't going away tomorrow. You said yourself there is paperwork, interviews and who knows what else. Use this time to help ease the transition for everyone, including you. You support her, and I support you. That's my promise. And if it doesn't work out with the aunt, then you and I will sit down and have a serious case of contemplation and discussion. Okay?"

Holly watched as Gail nodded acceptance and closed her eyes taking in everything that had been said.

The blonde peacefully opened her eyes and placed her hand over Holly's as it still cupped her cheek before turning slightly to kiss her palm and tenderly whisper, "I love you."

Holly let the tears roll down her face without any care and placed a gently kiss on her girlfriend's lips. "I have loved you since the moment I met you. I know that sounds impossible, but I truly believe it. I love you very much, Gail."

"I believe it. I believe you."

* * *

_A/N: A few notes: 1. As always, thank you very much for the reviews and such I am forever grateful. 2. I apologize for the slight delay in this chapter. Work is beyond busy and I may have just binge watched both seasons of Orange is the New Black for the first time in the last week. Had I written this earlier, there would have been a very strong chance Gail and Holly would have ended up being jailed on charges of tampering with evidence to protect a child or something equally noble and the rest of the story would have been about their crazy new adventures in the state pen and the people they met. (Someone fanfic that!) 3. I capped a little on the U.S, but I feel it is my natural right as an American. We like to make fun of ourselves – well the tree hugging ones do anyway. I'm sure fictional Sophie would actually be very happy living in upstate NY. It's quite a nice place._


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: I am really sorry this is so short and took so long to post. I've had a bout with the dreaded writer's block and wanted to get something out there to stir the creative juices again. I know what I want to do for the next chapter so hopefully is should be up in the next few days. I also broke down and created a tumblr page at iamthelittlerat. I have no idea how to use it, but if you find me and send me writing prompts or whatnot, I will do my best to respond._

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Holly rolled onto her side, still half-asleep, and reached out to cuddle with her girlfriend. Sunday morning being lazy in bed was all the plans she had until evening and she was ready to get it started with her favorite blonde. Much to her surprise, all she managed to get a hold of was the pile of pillows Gail liked to hoard. She opened one eye and surveyed the rest of the space. Gail was nowhere to be seen. Holly rolled back and checked the time to see that is was still, in fact, quite early.

With a groan, she sat up and began her decent out of bed in search of her girlfriend. She made her way down the hall, peeking into the bathroom, and then slowly down the steps. Before actually spotting Gail, she could hear her speaking quietly in the kitchen over the phone. Holly paused to listen to the soft reassuring tone Gail was speaking with. Holly only knew Gail to use it for two reasons – one, when she really wanted to express her feelings to Holly and the second being anytime she spoke with Sophie.

These last few weeks with Sophie had been difficult for everyone. It had taken a few days of investigation and interviews with Sophie's new found Aunt to determine that she had been fit enough for consideration of providing a permanent home for the little girl. While the aunt, Lena, was open to the idea of having Sophie live with her and her family, she hadn't been overwhelmingly pleased with the idea. Still it was enough for Sophie's caretakers to decide to move forward with introductions of all those involved. That was two weeks ago and this weekend was the first time Sophie was having an overnight visit in Albany. Because of the distance, her social worker, Mrs. Lawrence had accompanied her and they would stay Friday through Sunday.

Sophie had called Gail five times in the last two days – six if you counted the call Gail was currently on. Mrs. Lawrence had given Sophie a phone to use that had only the numbers programmed for her, Mrs. Jackson, Gail and the police (in case of emergency). Poor Sophie was so nervous about the visit that the first day she got confused and accidentally called the police thinking she would reach Gail. It took two hours that first night to sort everything out. The rest of the weekend hadn't gone much better. Sophie was scared of her new surroundings and the sweet little girl that usually smiled so bright, had instead called Gail multiple times near tears when her cousins would say something mean or when her Aunt made a meal she hated but was told she had to eat it anyway.

Holly knew how much of a toll it was taking on Gail; hearing the little girl over the phone confused and occasionally whiny. Gail had been doing her best to help Sophie with this transition and Holly had been true to her word and supporting her girlfriend as much as possible, but it was all getting to be difficult and they knew there were still months of the same ahead of them.

Holly quietly stepped into the kitchen and leaned into Gail who was resting her elbows on the counter top and kissed the blonde between her shoulder blades a few times before wrapping her arms around her waist. Holly smiled lazily at the way Gail instinctively pulled her in closer while never turning her attention away from the eight year old on the other side of the phone. Holly listened in as Gail promised she was still going to visit her on Tuesday like she always did and how Sophie should give her new family a chance. She couldn't hear everything Sophie was saying, but something the little girl said made Gail's body tense briefly and that worried Holly. Everything about the situation was worrying Holly, to be honest. The dependence and love Gail and Sophie shared was getting deeper and was going to make it all the more traumatizing when Sophie moved to Albany permanently. She didn't want Gail to stop being part of Sophie's life – she never wanted that – but a part of her felt like it would curb the pending heartbreak. Gail was so guarded when it came to love; to even suggest that she begin to separate herself from Sophie more than she already was would cause her girlfriend to spiral.

When Gail ended the call, she turned to face Holly and buried her face into her girlfriend's neck and sighed loudly.

"I said something about her family and she called me her family… Hol, this little girl is going to be the death of me."

Holly tightened her hold around Gail and kissed her temple. "Tell me what you need?"

Gail shook her head slightly. "Just tell me I'm doing the right thing. She should go, right? We're not..not…"

"No, honey, we're not hurting her. I know she's upset and confused by all this, but you're helping her the best way possible. She knows she can talk to you and you love her and that's what she needs right now. If it doesn't work out, then we'll work through that too. Okay?"

Gail just nodded, gave Holly a quick kiss and moved out of her embrace to get them both coffees. She placed the cup in front her girlfriend who took it gratefully.

"I think you're move in love with that coffee than you are with me."

Holly smirked, "Well this coffee didn't keep me up until early morning having its way with me."

Gail held up her hands in mock surrender. "Well I'm sorry. Here I am trying to make sure my girlfriend is stress free and relaxed for the fun-filled evening we are about to endure and this is the thanks I get."

"So the multiple orgasms were about distressing?"

"I'm quite the nurturer, Holly. One could even call me a stress therapist."

"Uh huh. And that new thing…did you learn that while Googling 'relaxation techniques?'"

Gail laughed and finally began to relax from her morning call. Bantering with Holly always lured her into a state of contentment.

"Who said I had to Google that one? You think I'm not creative enough to come up with it on my own? I can close my eyes at any time and imagine ten new ways to make you lose your mind."

Holly took a drink of her coffee and volleyed, "Only ten? You're such a lady lovin' newbie." The towel thrown at her was not the least bit unexpected.

"Whatever, Nerd. Aligning our bodies like constellations or whatever other brainiac shit you want to try doesn't count."

"If you give me a few seconds for this coffee to kick in, I feel like there's a Cassiopeia joke just waiting to makes itself known."

"Too late! You lose. I win."

Holly didn't try and hide her amusement from watching Gail do a little dance of victory as she walked into the living room with her coffee. She followed her girlfriend and snuggled up to her on the couch.

"I'm not stressed about this evening. I know from all the stories I should be, but I'm fine."

Gail ran her fingers through Holly's long dark hair. "Really? Isn't meeting the parents supposed to instill fear or something? I'm fairly petrified about meeting yours, hence the reason I am also very thankful they don't live in this province."

Holly chuckled. "My parents already love you via phone. Seeing you in person isn't going to change that."

"I don't talk to your parents over the phone."

"They hear you making comments when I am trying to talk to them. My mom thinks you are, and I quote, hilarious."

"Well she has good taste. This isn't about me though. Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yeah, I guess. I don't know. It's not like I've gone through this a bunch of times. You said your parents seemed okay with us…"

"They are. Or at least they appear to be. They haven't really mentioned it since we talked about it last month except to say they want to meet you. Believe me, if my Mom had an issue about it we would all know. The moose in Manitoba would know."

"So it should be fine. It's just dinner." The truth was Holly was a little nervous about having Sunday dinner with the Peck's, but she was trying to put on a brave face. Gail had had a lot of issues with her parents in the past, but they we still family and had recently been more supportive of her career and life choices. This was an important step in their relationship and she wanted to get it right.

"I know it's just dinner, but my parents can be… well… they can be just a lot and I don't want you to run for the hills after spending a few hours with them."

"Gail, I'm not running, I promise. I'm not dating Ann and Phil Peck. I'm dating you and meeting them won't change that."

Gail scrunched up her face then let her eyes go wide. "Elaine and Bill! Holly!"

Holly rolled her eyes. "Really? You fell for that? I know every bone, ligament, and cell structure in the human body in three different languages and you think I forgot your parent's names? That was for mocking my sexual fantasies, Officer."

Gail swatted a pillow at Holly in retaliation. "Mocking is not the right word… I have benefited from many of those fantasies and therefore would not mock. By brainiac, I meant sexy and highly desirable. I live to learn the positions of Lynx and Aquarius."

Holly paused for a second and took in what Gail just said thinking of a comeback when it hit her. "Oh my god, you just used constellations to tell me you want to have sex in the shower! You totally just won today's nerd round!"

Gail did her best to appear shocked by the suggestion. "Holly, I have NO idea what you're talking about!"

"Don't play that with me, Peck. Aquarius represents water and Lynx is a cat. You just said you wanted the cat in a sexual position in water."

"I randomly pick two constellations…"

"Lynx is not a common constellation, Gail. You know all of them don't you?"

Gail bit her bottom lip and slowly shook her head no unconvincingly.

Holly turned and straddled Gail's legs and placed her hands on the blonde's shoulders leaning in to kiss her.

"You know all the constellations and you intentionally picked the two that represented what you wanted. Admit it and maybe you'll get your little fantasy."

Gail wrapped her hands around Holly's ass and pushed her girlfriend closer towards her. "It's your fantasy, Holly. You're the one that took my random words and wrapped your crazy logic around them. But, I mean, if you want me to play along…"

"Gail?"

"Yeah?"

"Let's go have sex in the shower."

"Well, if you insist…"

_Next chapter is of course...the dinner..._


	12. Chapter 12

Gail pulled Holly's car into her parents' driveway right behind Steve and Traci. She then turned to her girlfriend who had become shockingly quiet in the last ten minutes. She was used to nervous-rambling Holly, but petrified-into-selective-mute Holly… well that was new.

"Look! Steve and Traci are here. We can all walk in together."

Holly sort of nodded.

Gail caught the attention of Steve as he stepped out of his car and motioned for him to hold on. She then grabbed her girlfriend's hand. "Holly? Hol? Lunchbox? Aquarius? Nerdbait? Hey you!"

Holly finally turned toward Gail and shook her head like she was trying to get the cobwebs out. "Uh? I'm fine. We're good. Let's go."

"Babe, you've gone monosyllabic. I don't think you're as good as you think you are. Deep breaths, it's only my parents. You were fine all day, what happened?"

"I'm…" Holly caught the look Gail was giving her – the one that said 'are you really going to lie to a police officer' and changed her response. "I don't know. I was fine. I am fine, but then you turned into this housing plan, with these huge-ass houses, and things just got a little fuzzy."

Gail scratched her forehead in confusion. "You're worried because you think my parents are rich? Huh? You do remember you pay in taxes more than my entire salary right?"

"It's not a money thing. It's a 'this is where Gail grew up and her parents live' and 'she used to ride her bike down these streets' and 'I really don't want to mess this up' thing. The big houses just add to the intimidation."

Gail leaned in and quickly gave Holly a kiss. "You're not going to mess this up. I promise you. And even if you do, I'll mess it up so much more and that's all they'll really remember."

"You're not helping."

"Holly, you are amazing and brilliant and my parents are going to make Steve and I compete to see who can be their second kid when they try to adopt you in favor of us. Actually, you and Traci will be competing for first and second kid and Steve and I will be competing for house pet. Let's not forget the fact that any of us competing to be IN this family is the strangest part of what I just said. Now let's go, Lunchbox. We have parents to show off our coupledom."

"Coupledom? I think you hit your head and made that word up."

"And Holly, I think you hit your head if you think I ever rode a bike down that street, but did I point it out? Noooooo."

Holly rolled her eyes and then got out of the car. She really was alright – it was just a momentary lapse. She loved Gail and meeting her parents wasn't going to change that in anyway. The two women joined Steve and Traci and they all greeted each other with Traci giving Holly a sympathetic and supportive hug.

"Don't worry, Holly. It's not even close to as bad as Steve and Gail like to make it seem. Plus there's alcohol – lots of it. And if Gail is anything like Steve, then she will be super nice and accommodating to make up for this for at least a week."

"For a week? I'll take two consecutive hours!" Holly yelped when Gail pinched her ass just as Bill was opening the door. The brunette's eyes immediately went wide as the three others burst into laughter.

Bill didn't even bother asking; he knew what troublemakers his children could be. Instead he motioned for them to come inside and mused, "Someday my children will be adults. Your mother is finishing a call. Drinks in the study to start…"

Once inside, Gail formally introduced her father to her girlfriend. All it took was Bill to ask Holly if she was as interested in history as Gail said for the two to jump into a conversation on a new book about Jack the Ripper. Bill barely even acknowledged anyone else as they walked into the study. Gail looked at Steve and threw her hands up in the air. Five minutes in and she was already down one parent - that was a record.

Steve joined Gail in the corner of the room while Traci was getting a drink and whispered, "She had to be history buff? I'm going to get kicked out of the will, aren't I?"

Gail smiled triumphantly and twisted her hands Machiavellian-y, "My plan is finally coming together."

"You planned bringing a woman home, ditching Mom's mission to put you on a high-profile undercover gig, telling them you want to join CYAC instead and have it all work out perfectly wrapped up in a nice family dinner?"

"You know about the undercover thing?" Gail asked as she looked around to make sure no one was listening. Luckily Bill was now fully engrossed in showing Traci and Holly his book on the Rebellions of 1837.

"Come on, sister. I know everything."

Gail glared at her brother until he caved, which took about three seconds.

"Fine, Guns and Gangs is helping with some of the initial set-up. I saw your name on one of the earlier reports so I asked Mom about it. She told me about CYAC too. They went with the other candidate, officially, in case she didn't tell you."

"She actually did. In true Elaine fashion, the phone call went something like 'you're still a slacker and a screw-up but not as bad as you used to be so I'm going to let you off the hook on this one.' Holly was beyond relieved at the news."

"I bet." Steve tilted his head towards his Dad, Traci and Holly. "Should we go save them?"

Gail regarded the way Holly's face was lit up telling her Dad about some kind of forensic evidence found near the lake closing a cold case from seventy years ago. She was slightly rambling and her hands were talking just as much as she was. Traci and her Dad kept interrupting her with questions. Gail smiled widely, "Are you crazy? You interrupt that and we'll be the ones that need saving!"

Steve took a long pull from his beer and moped only half-joking, "They really are going to like them better than us, aren't they?"

Gail grabbed the rest of his beer and finished it. "Face it, brother, we like them better than us. Of course Mom and Dad will."

Before Steve could answer, Elaine Peck swooped into the room making her presence known.

"I am so sorry for the delay, but when the mayor calls…"

"You check to see if he's high?"

"Steven!"

Steve and Gail shared mischievous grins before both walking over to their girlfriends. Steve dutifully tossed a 'sorry, Mother' over his shoulder as he passed her.

Gail took Holly's hand and they shared an intimate smile before she turned towards her mother. "Mom, I'd like you to meet Holly Stewart. Her birthday is August 14, 1981 and she was born in Calgary. That should make it easier for you to do the background check."

Elaine extended her hand to shake Holly's as she said, "Sweetheart, she's on payroll. I already had that information."

Holly shot her head back and forth between Gail and Elaine with her hand still in the older woman's grasp. She then laughed nervously. "You're kidding, right? Oh, you're really not."

"Relax, Holly, you're clean although you may want to quit parking your car on Victoria after midnight."

Holly looked back over to Gail who just shrugged her shoulders. She was going to pay for the dearly later. She finally stuttered out, "Superintendent, I…uh…sometimes do research at St. Michael's and uh…"

Elaine placed a hand on Holly's forearm to stop her and winked. "Unless you're planning on leaving my daughter to join the army or come to work high, you're still doing so much better than the last few. Now, shall we go to the dining room and get dinner started?"

Elaine motioned for everyone to join them. The crew trickled out leaving Gail and Holly for last.

Holly turned quickly to Gail and nearly hissed, "You left me on my own there! Actually you helped her!"

Gail snatched a quick kiss before Holly could protest. "Hol, it's what she does. If I told you beforehand she would have sniffed it out and made it so much worse. I think she really likes you!"

"That's liking me? She did a background check, Gail."

"Didn't you hear her call you by the right name on the first try? She sometimes doesn't even do that with Steve! Look, Hol, she's a police officer. Her father was police…her grandfather…her husband, father-in-law, uncles, an aunt, countless cousins, her children… This is a family that always ALWAYS believes that knowledge equals power."

Holly took a deep breath to calm her nerves and thought about what Gail just said. There was a weird logic to it and Elaine had been somewhat jovial about the whole thing. She had nothing to hide, but still it seemed like an unfair advantage the Peck's had over the rest of the world and she couldn't help but be a little ticked by the whole thing. As she thought about the Peck dynamic, something occurred to her and made her pull her girlfriend back from beginning to walk out of the room.

"Gail, did you ever run a background check on me?"

Gail placed her hand on Holly's cheek and used her thumb to gently caress it. "No. I swear to you I never did. I didn't even consider it. Steve asked me once after he met you in the hospital and I immediately said no."

"I'm sorry I asked…"

"It's okay."

"Gail, I trust you. I love you."

"I love you too, nervous nelly, now let's get to dinner before my stomach starts eating itself."

Holly laughed and relaxed a little as she followed her girlfriend through the house. "While technically one could say that's possible if you begin to burn through calories, I seriously doubt you of all people would ever find out."

"Fine, I want more alcohol."

"Now that I can believe."

Once everyone was seated around the dining room table, conversation began to flow fairly easily. It was mostly about cases everyone was involved in and Holly chimed in when asked. She also took the time to observe her surroundings.

Elaine and Bill each sat at an end representing the two heads of the family with Steve and Traci on one side and Gail and her on the other. Dinner had clearly been catered, but wasn't overly formal and true to Traci's word there was a few bottles of wine already opened and ready. She had no idea who would have set it all up seeing as Bill had been with them and Elaine was on a call, but she didn't ask and she didn't need to when Elaine commented on an 'Anna' always providing such good service.

She also observed the slight changes she saw in the way Gail, and even Steve, carried themselves. They sat up straighter and each had a slight edge to their tone and demeanors – almost as if they were ready at any second to defend themselves or their girlfriends. She knew Elaine had recently been a lot more supportive of Gail, but she heard the stories and knew that wasn't always the case. Gail once described Elaine as having the ability to take hairpin turns into manipulation and insults if the mood suited her and you could practically feel Steve and Gail's anticipation of it in the way their bodies radiated a more guarded attitude. It was such a contrast to the way Holly grew up. Her parents were all hugs and comfort. Support was given almost unconditionally and she had never felt intimidated or nervous about talking to them. Even coming out to them was a mostly non-event in her life. She knew she was very lucky in that respect and Gail was too for how her parents were currently handling all this; but there was still something missing from the table. This was a family that clearly had a fundamental love for one another, but very little ability to show sincere affection or communication. It was opening Holly's eyes in how and why Gail did some of the things she did.

Something Holly was expecting that wasn't happening was an interrogation. She was after all sitting at a table of all police, but most questions or opportunities for her to engage in conversation were not requested in a way that she felt like she was on display. That didn't mean she wasn't being judged. She recognized that immediately, but she had assumed it would be more overt. What she noticed instead was how Bill and Elaine differed in their assessments of someone.

Bill immediately engaged in a topic of his interest and allowed the other person to either sink or swim in keeping up with him. She's pretty sure she passed his test with their shared interest in history. Elaine was a bit craftier. Holly now recognized that the background check comment was a test on how Holly reacted to her private life being invaded. Being with a Peck meant you were more on display in this town and Elaine was making sure Holly was comfortable with that fact – plus she was probably just nosey. Gail was right - had her girlfriend told her beforehand, she would have failed spectacularly. Not putting Holly on the spot with twenty questions was also a test. She was being questioned as to whether she could fit into this family without being the center of attention – could she incorporate herself without being asked and hold her own.

Gail, for the most part, ate, drank and kept to herself allowing Steve and Traci to do the heavy lifting. Holly would get the occasional supportive smile from her girlfriend and she was grateful for it but she could tell this was a room where Elaine and Bill commanded, Steve played along and Gail just tried to stay absorbed into the background. Holly was starting to feel like this entire dinner was a master's thesis on social anthropology and psychology. Whatever it was, she just hoped she was keeping up. Gail might not have come out and said it, but she could tell this event was important to her. As much as Gail would hate to admit it, Holly knew she still sought the acceptance and backing of her parents.

Around halfway through the meal, Elaine turned her attention to Gail. "Sweetheart, I spoke with Marian yesterday about your work in the last month. She gave a raving review."

Gail looked up from her plate somewhat stunned. She wasn't used to receiving positive feedback from one of her parents – especially not in front of other people. She cast a quick glance over to Traci. She hadn't mentioned wanting to join CYAC and the reason she was being assigned all the cases with children to her friend and was expecting a confused look in return. Marian Johnson was the head of CYAC and a close friend of Elaine's so it wouldn't take a huge amount of thinking for Traci to put two and two together. She quickly gave a friendly glare in Steve's direction when she realized by Traci's complete lack of confusion that he must have told her.

"I'm happy to hear that, Mom. The cases are challenging but CYAC does amazing work." Gail looked to her Dad and noticed a small approving smile thrown in her direction. It felt like a gift. Holly's pinkie finger hooking hers under the table ever so briefly felt like home.

"Marian has made recommendations to the Chief about reorganizing CYAC to better support our communities. Part of that will be embedding individuals directly into each division that are specially trained to work with children. She actually got the idea from having you available on call for the last month. The Chief liked the idea so much he has fast-tracked the project and we are going to pilot it at 15."

Gail opened her mouth to speak when she noticed her mother looking at her expectantly. She knew she was supposed to say something, she just wasn't sure what.

"Gail, you wouldn't happen to know anyone in the division that would be interested in being part of this program, would you?"

This time Gail actually did respond to her mother. "Yes. Uh, yes, ma'am, I would. I would very much so."

Elaine grinned widely and took a sip of her wine allowing her daughter to stew for just a moment. "Well, I'm happy to hear that because you've already been chosen and approved by Shaw, Johnson, the Chief and, of course, me. There will be one more spot available for applicants, but you've already earned yours. As this is the pilot you will also be asked to set-up the training and guidelines for how other divisions roll it out. Be successful and you can join CYAC full-time, if you so choose, within a year. Congratulations, dear."

Gail blushed when everyone else raised their glasses to congratulate her. She happily accepted the kiss on her cheek from her girlfriend along with the whisper in her ear that they would celebrate properly later. She looked over at her mother and nodded as a thank you which was returned with a proud smile. Her mother held her word and she worked hard to achieve a goal and together they were moving forward. It was something she never thought she would have with her parents. She wanted to burst into happy tears, but instead took a deep breath and another drink of wine.

As the table jumped back into finishing dinner, they were interrupted by the telephone ringing. It was the landline, which made all the Peck's immediately stop. No one called them on it unless it was important. Bill and Elaine passed a look between them and when Bill nodded, Elaine got up from the table to get the phone from the study.

After ten minutes of near silence, Gail stood and asked, "Anyone want more wine?" As she went to turn and grab another bottle from the kitchen, she was stopped mid-spin by her mother's hand on her shoulder gently but firmly indicating she should return to her seat.

Elaine also took her seat again with the phone still in hand and began without preamble. "At 18:00 this evening 15 brought in a suspect for questioning they believed was tied to the recent bombings." Elaine turned to Holly, "I believe you helped identify the man?"

Holly's head shot up and she looked around the room until she realized she was supposed to respond. "Ted McDonald?"

"Yes, dear, that would be him. At around 20:00, there was an explosion in the evidence room of 15." Elaine paused as her family all began asking questions over one another. She put her hand up and everyone at the table stopped, even Traci and Holly, understanding that is was the Peck way of letting a room know it wasn't their turn to speak.

"No one was seriously injured in the blast. Gail, Traci, your friend Andy McNally was on the outskirts, but was cleared at the scene."

The room remained quiet. Holly reached over and grabbed Gail's hand squeezing it tight. She looked across the table to see Steve and Traci were in a similar position. It was Bill that finally spoke.

"Elaine, there's more to this. Where's McDonald now?"

Elaine gave him a knowing look. No one could read her like her husband. "McDonald slit his wrists in an interrogation room while unsupervised. The Chief has already launched an investigation into how it could have happened. That is not the only reason I was called though; it appears McDonald was quite vocal prior to his death as to motive. He lost his child in a bombing a number of years ago and believes authorities didn't do their jobs. He informed Detective Swarek that there were three more bombs planted in the city."

Everyone in the room again remained quiet all coming up with a hundred different scenarios as to what was going to happen next and how everything at 15 could have gone so completely wrong in such a short period of time.

Traci stood, "I should get back there. See if I can…"

Elaine placed her hand on the table and tapped it. "Traci, please have a seat." Everyone, including Traci, understood it wasn't a request.

Elaine took a deep breath. This was the part she was dreading the most. "McDonald didn't indicate where the explosives were, but he did narrow down the search. He was targeting the children of police. He wanted us to understand his lose."

Gail felt Holly's hand squeezed hers like a vice. She looked toward her girlfriend to take in her expression to see Holly turning a ghostly pale. Before she could say anything, Holly started rambling.

"Alright, so this is happening. I mean, I'm not the only one here that recognizes that everyone but me in this room is either the child of a cop or a cop with a child, right? I mean, some of you are multiples of that…"

Gail released her hand from Holly's and placed it on her shoulder instead trying to calm her down. She leaned in closer and whispered in Holly's ear. "Babe, it's okay. We know. It's okay. We're right here and we're safe."

Elaine and Bill caught each other's attention again and let their eyes wonder over to their daughter. Both had never witnessed their daughter take the lead in comforting or showing affection to someone she dated in front of them. It was heart-warming even under these conditions.

Traci stood again. "Oh, God…Leo…"

"Traci, your son is safe. He's with your mother and Officers Price and Collins immediately went to him. The house was cleared and they are being monitored."

"I need to call him. I need to go…" Traci was frantically grabbing at her phone and starting to walk out of the dining room only to be stopped by Steve. He grabbed the phone and put his arms around her. He looked at both his parents confirming what he suspected before calmly taking the phone from her.

"Traci, you shouldn't use your phone right now. I don't think any of us should, okay? Come back to the table, please."

Traci struggled a bit to get away from her boyfriend. "Steve, I need to get to my son right now!"

Elaine moved to stand near Traci and Steve placing her hand slowly on Traci's shoulder. "He's being looked after; I promise you and I don't make promises lightly. Right now we all need to be calm and sit down. Please do that, Detective."

Traci momentarily stared down Elaine showing she would do anything to protect her son. She finally exhaled and relented when she saw the same motherly spark in the eyes looking back at her. Something passed between the two women in that moment. They may have very different opinions on how to raise their children, but one thing they both understood in the other was that they would die for their family. With that understanding, Traci walked back to her seat.

Gail broke the tense silence that had once again fallen upon the room. "Is the bomb squad on their way here?"

Elaine took a long drink of her wine before answering. "Yes. We're going to need to stay put for now. I want all mobile phones turned off. If there is a bomb, we have no idea what the trigger could be." Everyone, even Bill, did as asked. "There is another team heading to your apartment first, Gail. They will then go to Steve's. Once the team is finished here, they will go to your home, Holly."

Holly looked up and interrupted, "My house? I'm not…"

Gail half-smiled, "Hol, if this nutjob was following me, he would think I lived at your place not mine."

Holly looked around the table. Even under the current stress of the situation, she couldn't help but blush at the fact that she had just confirmed that Gail practically lived at her house in front of her girlfriend's family - especially since it must have already been very clear to Elaine for having requested her house be swept in the first place. This was turning out to be the strangest meeting of the parents ever.

All she could think to say was, "Oh."

Elaine just nodded before continuing. "Traci, both your mother's and your house have already been cleared. Since Leo is a child and we're all together, he came first. It was the right decision. There are teams sweeping other colleagues' homes and vehicles as well." Elaine took another drink of wine and quipped, "So sit tight family and enjoy the rest of dinner as we wait for the bomb sniffing dogs."

Gail lifted her wine glass and said, "And who said meeting the family wasn't an explosive event… Ow!"

Steve asked, "Who kicked her?"

Holly and Bill both said in unison, 'I did,' followed by Steve, Elaine and Traci and responding, 'Good.'

With that they all sat quietly taking in that the next few minutes or hours could very easily change all their lives.

* * *

A/N: I'm not super happy with this chapter. I feel like it could have flowed a better. I know where I want to take this story, but I've hit a bit of an imagination wall on writing it. I'm working on it but I apologize if I bored you all to sleep. As always, I do thank you all very much for the feedback received on my stories. -thelittlerat


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